Today, a new exhibition opens at The Photographers' Gallery in London, showcasing a collection of rare historical images of people cross-dressing for the camera.
The pictures, of which the subjects are largely unknown, date from 1880 and feature individuals posing for the camera while deliberately dressed or gesturing in a manner traditionally thought of as relating to the ‘opposite sex’.
Today, with gender and sexuality more fluid and personal than ever before, these pictures provide a fascinating insight into a time when traditional gender roles were enforced.
The amateur photographs come from the personal archives of French filmmaker and photography collector Sébastien Lifshitz, who would trawl the likes of eBay, junk shops, flea markets and garage sales to amass his collection. As it grew bigger and bigger, it enabled him to create a more informed and nuanced history of cross-dressing culture, one which spans classes and nationalities, attitudes and genders.
Lifshitz’s collection even includes some images of Marie-Pierre Pruvot, an Algerian-born French transsexual woman better known by her stage name Bambi, who, for 20 years, performed at Parisian transgender showgirl revue Le Carrousel de Paris. Pruvot is still alive today and Lifshitz’s film about her won Best Documentary at the Berlin Film Festival in 2013.
The Photographers' Gallery says the exhibition will offer a fascinating context for today’s diverse queer and trans community and pre-empts a world where self-expression is celebrated.
Click through to see some of the images on display.
Under Cover: A Secret History Of Cross-Dressers is on at The Photographers' Gallery, London, 23rd February – 3rd June 2018. Free admission before 12pm, £4 after. More information here.
Man in makeup wearing ring.
Photograph from a photo booth, with highlights of colour. United States, circa 1920.
There's nothing new about sleazy photographers lurking around celebrities to snap photos to sell to tabloids and gossip sites for megabucks, but in the aftermath of #MeToo, the pervasive sexism that makes the practice permissible was even more glaringly obvious.
ITV's This Morning presenter Holly Willoughby, who proudly held a white rose at the Brits, has shared her fury after photos emerged of her (and other women who went to the Brits) attempting to get out of cars on the night, claiming it shows that "time's up on Time's Up".
"At the beginning of the night we held white roses and walked down a red carpet full of the hope and pride that comes with the #timesup campaign," Willoughby wrote on Instagram. "At the end of the night, cameras were held low to get a photo up our skirts... time's apparently up on #timesup."
Many people are clearly in agreement, with the post having racked up more than 220k likes since it was posted 16 hours ago. "Disgusting. Treated like pieces of meat. I bet it sells though," one woman wrote.
"The gutter press will always be the gutter press," said another. "Name and shame the papers that publish these pictures. Make them see that they are part of the problem."
Another wrote: "Old habits die hard! They (the photographers) are there for one reason, to make money, the most shocking photos will reap the most rewards, until the media as a whole stop rewarding it they will continue to seek it. Such a shame. Funny how they prey on women more than men."
Absolutely disgusting of the press. What happened to equality? This is an intrusion and they should be ashamed of themselves. Well said holly x
I am appalled of the behaviour of the press. Who publishes these? I hope there are some female editors (and men) who make a stand against this. #media#TIMESUP
Willoughby has brought the issue of upskirting back into the public consciousness, with many people on social media saying they now believe upskirt photos should be made illegal and that the paps in question "should be arrested".
"This makes me furious! The sooner ‘upskirting’ becomes illegal, the better. It’s an utter violation," wrote one woman on Instagram in response to Willoughby's post.
I’m guessing if you have to go to such lengths the photographers papers & mags aren’t doing so well which says more about the types of people engrossed in... And it was only a few days or so ago it was talked up-skirting being made a criminal offence - clearly needs to happen
Campaigner Gina Martin has been lobbying to change the law on upskirt photos in the UK since a man took an upskirt photo of her at a gig in London's Hyde Park last year. She went straight to the police but was told there was nothing they could do as there is no specific law against upskirting in England, unlike Scotland where it has been an offence since 2010.
Martin is now campaigning for it to be made a sexual offence under the 2003 Sexual Offences Act. The government says culprits can be dealt with via other legal means, but a recent investigation found that only 11 people have been charged for the practice since 2015.
You can sign the Care2 petition calling for upskirt photos to be made illegal under the Sexual Offences Act of 2003here.
If you have experienced sexual harassment or violence of any kind, please visitRape Crisisor call 0808 802 9999.
It’s never been easier to keep up with what’s going on in the world. The news is everywhere – in our Facebook feeds, on the morning commute, during that lazy half hour before you switch off the TV and go to bed. But the tide of global affairs is often more upsetting than uplifting and it can be tempting to bury our heads in the sand. As the saying goes: a picture is worth a thousand words, so to offer a different perspective we've rounded up seven of the most memorable images of the last seven days' events, captured by the best photojournalists on the planet.
Canada's Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir celebrate their gold win in the ice dance, free dance of the figure skating event during the Pyeongchang 2018 Winter Olympic Games at the Gangneung Ice Arena in Gangneung on 20th February 2018.
Photo: ARIS MESSINIS/AFP/Getty Images
A woman tries to save her merchandise from the fire that affected the Nan Gerit market, also called Hyppolite market, in Port-au-Prince on 18th February 2018. The fire follows the February 13th blaze that ravaged the historic Iron Market.
Photo: HECTOR RETAMAL/AFP/Getty Images
Stormzy performs at the BRIT Awards 2018, held at The O2 Arena on 21st February 2018 in London, England.
Artists perform dragon dance under the molten iron fireworks at Beijing Happy Valley during the Chinese New Year holiday on 18th February 2018 in Beijing, China. Chinese people celebrate lunar new year from 16th February.
Photo: Fu Tian/Chinese News Service/VCG/Getty Images
Victoria Seltzer, 11, writes a passage on a cross set up in a makeshift memorial in front of Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in memory of the 17 people that were killed on 14th February, on 21st February 2018 in Parkland, Florida. Police arrested 19-year-old former student Nikolas Cruz for the mass shooting at the high school.
Photo: Joe Raedle/Getty Images
Indonesian schoolchildren walk together at Sipandak elementary school in Tiga Pancur village in Karo, North Sumatra on 19th February 2018, as thick volcanic ash from Mount Sinabung volcano rises into the air following another eruption. Sinabung roared back to life in 2010 for the first time in 400 years and has remained highly active since.
Photo: ANTO SEMBIRING/AFP/Getty Images
Queen Elizabeth II sits next to Anna Wintour as they view Richard Quinn's runway show before presenting him with the inaugural Queen Elizabeth II Award for British Design as she visits London Fashion Week's BFC Show Space on 20th February 2018 in London, England.
Photo: Yui Mok/Pool/Getty Images
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Airbnb has some pretty cool news. Ten years after cofounders Brian Chesky and Joe Gebbia inflated three airbeds in their San Francisco apartment, the company that changed the way you travel is set to shake things up again.
There's a whole bunch of new things to take in. First of all, for the travellers who don't want to take a chance, there's Airbnb Plus. This is a group of homes which have been verified in person against a 100-point checklist (yes, that includes how comfy the mattress is). There are over 300 of these places to choose from.
Next up is a new way to search. Currently on the site you have the choice between Entire Home, Private Room and Shared Space. And, let's face it, sometimes it can be hard to find what you want – endlessly scrolling for that perfect log cabin, city break apartment or far-flung treehouse can be a little confusing. Now, though, there are more filter options like "Vacation Home", "Unique", "B&B" and "Boutique". Vacation homes are properties that are perhaps second homes (one day, guys) or rental-specific, like chalets or beach houses. B&B and Boutique are dedicated spaces for hotels to list and, most excitingly (and Instagrammably), the Unique category helps you find some of the most out-there listings, from treehouses to bubble domes, airstreams to yurts.
Also announced is Beyond Airbnb, which is set to launch in spring. This section will house some of the most spectacular homes in the world, from 16th-century Tuscan mansions to French chateaux to beachside villas in Costa Rica – perfect for weddings, big birthdays or honeymoons. These bookings will offer custom-designed trips for those with a little more cash to spend.
Finally, people who already rent out their place will be aware of the Superhost scheme but now, as a guest, you can work up to becoming a Super guest, which awards those who behave well (ahem, we're looking at you, recent party-havers) the chance to get benefits like free airport pickups, treats and discounts.
Want to see some of the places available on Airbnb Plus? Click through to check them out...
The average price of getting married is going to increase to £32k in the next 10 years, according to projections based on data from the Office for National Statistics.
When you compare this to the average UK salary (£27,500 in 2017) – and the fact that the UK was forecast to have the worst wage growth of any wealthy nation this year, and who knows what will happen to our salaries post Brexit? – it doesn't look good for British couples who want to tie the knot.
The average cost of a wedding in 2006 was £18,773, meaning the figure will have ballooned by 60% in the 22 years to 2028, according to money.co.uk, which analysed ONS data from the past 80 years to make the prediction, taking into account inflation and rising expenses.dding
British couples are saving an average of £105 per month for their weddings, meaning it currently takes about a decade for the average couple to save for their big day.
Couples who want to end their marriages in a decade's time will also be in for a nasty shock too, the data suggests. The average cost of divorce is projected skyrocket by 25% from £47,014 to £60,415.8512 in 2028. Yikes.
Back in 2003, when the earliest data in this survey was recorded, it cost an average of £13,050 to terminate a union, meaning that in just a quarter of a century the cost of divorce will have risen by 360%.
While these figures are just predictions based on trends in official data, and external events like Brexit and the state of our wages could impact our finances, it might be time to start saving, or rethink what kind of wedding you want, if any.
Though March is supposed to bring the start of spring, we all know by now that it's foolish to rely too much on the fickle British weather. So if you find yourself craving duvet days this month, that's cool, and Netflix has you covered.
New shows to binge-watch include the third and final season of Love (pictured), the return of Marvel's Jessica Jones, and the second series of Lemony Snicket adaptation A Series of Unfortunate Events. Netflix is also adding a brand new interview with Nobel Peace Prize winner Malala Yousafzai, who sits down with David Letterman for an in-depth chat.
Some classic movies are joining the library too, including psychological thriller Misery, '70s horror favourite Carrie, and the original, very funny Guardians of the Galaxy film. Documentary lovers also have plenty to choose from, including Whitney: Can I Be Me, a poignant insight into the life and career of the late Whitney Houston.
Click through to see every single new title – and its release date – on Netflix this March.
Annihilation (2018)
Ex Machina director Alex Garland helms this intriguing sci-fi movie based on a novel by Jeff VanderMeer. It follows a group of scientists who venture into a mysterious quarantined zone full of mutating landscapes and creatures which has claimed the lives of nearly everyone else who's entered. Natalie Portman, Tessa Thompson and Oscar Isaac lead a strong cast, but the film is already under fire for alleged whitewashing.
Available 12th March
A Series of Unfortunate Events (2018)
Season two of Netflix's adaptation of the iconic children's books written by Lemony Snicket. The 10 new episodes are based on novels five through nine in the series, and star Neil Patrick Harris is joined by new cast members including Lucy Punch and Tony Hale.
Available 30th March
Benji (2018)
A Netflix original film about a determined dog who comes to the rescue when a little boy and his sister find themselves in danger. Don't even try to pretend you can resist!
Available 16th March
Black Lightning (2018)
Cress Williams ( Prison Break, Hart of Dixie) stars in this US superhero series based on the DC Comics character of the same name. He plays Jefferson Pierce aka Black Lightning, a retired superhero who returns to the fray when a dangerous gang threatens his local community.
New episodes added Tuesdays
Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014)
In the second Captain America film, Chris Evans' mighty superhero is tasked with saving the world from an enigmatic assassin known as the Winter Soldier. He's joined by a typically star-stuffed Marvel cast that includes Scarlett Johansson, Samuel L. Jackson and Robert Redford.
Available 30th March
Captain America: Civil War (2016)
And this is the third and most recent Captain America movie. This time, Evans' title character falls out with his friend and colleague Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.), causing the Avengers team to split into two rival factions. Captain America: Civil War also features Chadwick Boseman's first appearance as Black Panther.
Available 30th March
Carrie (1976)
Not the recent remake starring Chloë Grace Moretz, but the original film adaptation of Stephen King's classic horror novel. Sissy Spacek stars as the title character, a cruelly treated teenage girl who exacts a terrible revenge on prom night.
Available 1st March
Designated Survivor(2018)
Following a mid-season break, the hit US drama series starring Kiefer Sutherland continues. He plays a low-level Cabinet member who unexpectedly becomes president after a catastrophic attack kills everyone above him in the line of succession.
New episodes added Thursdays
Dinotrux Supercharged (2018)
Second season of the latest incarnation of Netflix's computer-animated kids' franchise Dinotrux. It's set in a prehistoric world and features characters that are part dinosaur and part – you've guessed it – truck.
Available 23rd March
First Match (2018)
Writer-director Olivia Williams makes her feature film debut with this Netflix original about a teenage girl who joins her high school's all-boys wrestling team. Rising star Elvire Emanuelle takes the super juicy-looking lead role.
Available 30th March
Girls Incarcerated(2018)
A new and intriguing-looking Netflix documentary series following the lives of teenage girls housed in a maximum security juvenile detention centre.
Available 2nd March
Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)
Chris Pratt, Zoe Saldana and Bradley Cooper lead the cast in one of the funniest Marvel superhero movies, but Vin Diesel steals scenes as the voice of Groot, a cute tree-like creature who has some very distinctive dance moves.
Available 20th March
Ice Age: The Meltdown(2006)
A solidly entertaining sequel to 2002's computer-animated hit Ice Age. The voice cast includes Queen Latifah, John Leguizamo, Will Arnett and Seann William Scott (aka Stifler from the American Pie movies).
Available 1st March
Marvel's Jessica Jones (2018)
At last! Second two of the superhero series starring Krysten Ritter arrives some two-and-a-half years after the first. It looks set to focus more on the history of detective/supehero Jessica Jones, and all 13 episodes have been directed by a woman – check out our thoughts on the trailer.
Available 8th March
Ladies First (2018)
A Netflix original documentary telling the remarkable life story of Deepika Kumari. She was born in poverty in a small Indian village where women weren't given equal opportunities, but smashed through the system to become the world's number one female archer at age 18.
Available 8th March
The Lady in the Van (2015)
This film adaptation of Alan Bennett's acclaimed stage play is a great Sunday afternoon movie. Maggie Smith delivers an excellent performance as Miss Shepherd, an eccentric but formidable woman who really did spend 15 years living in a van on Bennett's Camden driveway. Look out for cameos from several members of the History Boys cast.
Available 31st March
Love(2018)
Third and final season of the likeable romantic comedy series co-created by Judd Apatow. The new episodes see Gillian Jacobs' Mickey and Paul Rust's Gus make progress in their personal and professional lives, but also do battle with their own self-sabotaging impulses.
Available 9th March
Misery(1990)
A suitably creepy film adaptation of Stephen King's psychological horror novel. Kathy Bates won an Oscar for her brilliant performance as an isolated middle-aged woman who's a little too devoted to her favourite author.
Available 1st March
My Next Guest Needs No Introduction with David Letterman: Malala Yousafzai(2018)
Episode three of Netflix's new monthly talk show. This time, the legendary Letterman has a tête-à-tête with Malala Yousafzai, the revered Pakistani activist for female education and youngest ever recipient of the Nobel Peace Prize.
Available 9th March
Nightcrawler (2014)
A slick and gripping thriller film starring Jake Gyllenhaal as a man who records violent late-night events in LA so he can sell the footage to TV news stations. Riz Ahmed and Rene Russo co-star.
Available 30th March
Power Rangers: Ninja Steel (2017)
This new season of Power Rangers honours the show's 25th anniversary by featuring popular characters from past seasons alongside newer ones. All 26 episodes launch at once so there's plenty to binge-watch.
Available 15th March
Rapture (2018)
This eight-part documentary series, a Netflix exclusive, delves deep into the world of hip-hop and its massive global impact. Nas, Logic and 2 Chainz are among the rappers who contribute.
Available 30th March
Ricky Gervais: Humanity (2017)
The Office 's co-creator riffs on ageing, his own "spoiled" lifestyle, and the pros and cons of starting a family in this stand-up special. Going on past form, expect a few jokes to cut rather close to the bone.
Available 13th March
Riverdale(2018)
Season two of the addictive US teen drama featuring a load of characters who will be familiar to Archie Comics fans. KJ Apa, Camila Mendes and Lili Reinhart lead a bright young cast.
New episodes added Thursdays
Roxanne, Roxanne (2018)
After winning the Special Jury Award at Sundance last year, this hip-hop biopic is finally premiering on Netflix. Rising star Chanté Adams plays Lolita "Roxanne Shanté" Gooden, the teenage rap prodigy who lit up New York City's hip-hop scene in the '80s. Oscar winner Mahershala Ali co-stars.
Available 23rd March
Secret in Their Eyes (2015)
Psychological thriller about a fierce team of FBI investigators who are torn apart when they discover one of their own children has been murdered. Chiwetel Ejiofor, Nicole Kidman and Julia Roberts head up an excellent cast.
Available 4th March
Shadowhunters: The Mortal Instruments (2018)
Season three of the US fantasy series based on Cassandra Clare's novels. Each episode follows the adventures of a group of "shadowhunters", human-angel hybrids who hunt down demons, and the cast includes former Glee actor Harry Shum Jr.
New episodes added Wednesdays from 21st March
Spirit Riding (2018)
Season four of the computer-animated kids' series following the adventures of a 12-year-old girl and her beloved horse. It's based on the Oscar-nominated film Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron.
Available 16th March
Step Brothers (2008)
Comedy film starring Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly as a couple of immature middle-aged men forced to live together as stepbrothers when their parents get married. It's hardly subtle and sophisticated stuff, but there are some solid laughs here.
Available 31st March
Take Your Pills (2018)
A Netflix original documentary series delving into the growing popularity of performance-enhancing drugs like Adderall.
Available 16th March
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2009)
The original Swedish film adaptation of Stieg Larsson's blockbuster novel. Noomi Rapace stars as Lisbeth Salander, the punky computer hacker who helps veteran journalist Mikael Blomkvist (Michael Nyqvist) search for the killer of a woman who was murdered 40 years ago.
Available 2nd March
The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015)
Guy Ritchie directs this decent movie reboot of the classic '60s spy series. Armie Hammer, Alicia Vikander, Henry Cavill and Hugh Grant lead a starry cast, and the glamorous Italian locations are a treat.
Available 25th March
The Outsider (2018)
This Netflix original film stars Jared Leto as an American soldier who enters the world of the Yakuza (Japan's sort-of equivalent to the mafia) after they help him escape a prison sentence. Emile Hirsch and Deadpool 2 's Shiori Kutsuna co-star.
Available 9th March
Trolls: The Beat Goes On! (2018)
A second season of the kids' series based on the hit film starring Anna Kendrick and Justin Timberlake. Netflix's teaser for the new batch of episodes reads: "As Queen Poppy welcomes a new time of peace in Troll Village with parties, sports and holiday celebrations, Branch tries to be more fun-loving."
Available 9th March
Whiplash (2014)
Directed by La La Land 's Damien Chazelle, this acclaimed film follows the complicated relationship between an ambitious jazz student (Miles Teller) and his abusive tutor (J.K. Simmons, who won an Oscar for his seriously intense performance).
Available 31st March
Whitney: Can I Be Me (2016)
Poignant documentary film about Whitney Houston's incredible recording career and the immense sacrifices she made along the way. If you enjoy her music, this is definitely worth a watch.
Available 3rd March
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Time passed. Ten minutes? Half an hour? And then a shadow fell across her. And she knew it was him.
‘Sarah?’ She looked up at him.
‘Hey,’ she said, and something in her broke, yet again.
How did he still have the power to do that, after all this time?
‘I thought it was you, but I wasn’t sure. What are you doing here?’
‘What?’ She pretended to look confused.
‘Not exactly your neck of the woods, is it?’
‘I’m living in Booterstown now.’
‘When did you leave Portobello?’ he asked.
‘I was living in Stoneybatter before, actually.’
‘Oh, right.’
‘It doesn’t matter,’ she said quickly. ‘Listen, we should catch up. Do you want to grab a coffee?’
He checked his watch. ‘Sure,’ he said. ‘I have some time.’
As they walked down Breffni Road, he said, ‘I haven’t seen you in ages. I can’t even remember the last time we met.’
It had been three years.
We can’t break up, Sarah, he had said to her, three years ago, when she decided to stand still and to ask him for more.
She had pretended for so long to be sterile, clean, to have no needs of her own except to please him. She couldn’t do it anymore.
But we can’t break up, he had said to her while she tried not to cry. He didn’t like women who cried; it was messy, undignified.
We can’t break up because we were never in a real relationship in the first place.
They had only seen each other one more time after that, a stolen evening in an expensive hotel.
But Sarah didn’t want to think about that night and how it had ended. What he said. How he had looked at her.
‘Yeah, it’s been a while,’ Sarah said now.
‘You look great,’ he said.
He had always commented on her appearance, but it wasn’t in a weird way, she used to tell Fionn. Being admired by him didn’t feel like when other men would look at her, teeth bared as if they wanted to devour her.
Smile, love, men would shout as she passed them on the street. You’d be so much prettier if you smiled, as if a performance of joy was the price Sarah had to pay for existing in a female body in a public space.
‘You look well too,’ she said.
‘Thanks,’ he replied. ‘I’m feeling uncharacteristically relaxed. Just back from Paris with Flo and Harry.’
He held the door to the cafe open for her. Oonagh would have hated that, Sarah thought.
Chivalry is an outdated concept that only perpetuates patriarchal myths, she’d said at one of the insufferable dinner parties William threw regularly. The beautifully arranged dining table at the Killiney house, linen napkins and silver cutlery, a single orchid in a short tumbler at each seat.
The walls were laden with photos of Oonagh and William in their twenties and thirties, impossibly young and glamorous: Oonagh holding a placard above her head, demanding divorce or abortion rights, waving at the camera as she and a group of equally rebellious women set off on the train to Belfast to procure illegal condoms.
That’s why I’ve made sure that the men in this house know that housework isn’t a woman’s job, Oonagh had said as Oisin stood up to clear plates.
All the men.
She’d winked at William and he reached across the table to kiss her.
‘Paris,’ Sarah repeated. The coffee shop was small, wooden tables with jam jars full of wild flowers. The waitress gave them menus when they sat down. She was attractive, blonde hair and excellent teeth, and Sarah looked at him to see what his reaction would be.
‘I don’t need a menu,’ he told her. ‘I’ll have an Americano.’
‘Are you sure?’ the waitress replied. ‘Our gluten-free brownies are fab.’
‘I’m sure they are.’ He leaned back in his seat, looking at her more closely. ‘But, sadly... What’s your name?’
‘Luna.’
‘Luna? That’s an unusual name. But very pretty. I must say, it suits you,’ he said, and the waitress blushed. ‘But sadly, Luna, I’ll have to refuse.’ He looked at Sarah. ‘What’ll you have, Sarah?’
‘A chai latte.’
‘And a chai latte for my friend.’ He handed the menus back. ‘Thank you, Luna.’
After she left, he lowered his voice. ‘What kind of name is Luna?’
‘Maybe her mother was into Harry Potter.’
He didn’t answer, and checked his phone instead. That was rude, Sarah thought. Oisin would never do that. Oisin’s manners were impeccable; his mother wouldn’t have stood for anything less.
‘So. How was Paris?’
‘Paris is Paris,’ he said. ‘Harry enjoyed it though, and that’s the main thing.’
‘It’s cool the three of you went on holiday together.’
‘Oh, we’re terribly modern.’
‘Was Daniel all right with Florence going away with you?’
His jaw tightened. ‘No idea.’
‘Well, I’m glad it went okay – for Harry’s sake.’
‘I’m glad too. Although I will say seven days is too long to go without getting laid.’
Sarah wasn’t sure if she had heard him correctly, but then he smirked at her, confirming her suspicions. She knew that, later that evening, she would be able to articulate exactly why this had hurt her feelings, but for now, the perfect response was somehow just outside her grasp.
‘I’m sure you can survive seven days,’ she said, wishing her drink would arrive so she’d have something to do with her hands.
‘I think we both know that’s not true,’ he said. His eyes met hers and, for one moment, it was as if nothing had changed.
‘Here you go,’ the waitress said. She banged Sarah’s chai on the table, the milky liquid splashing onto the saucer. ‘Sorry,’ she said to Sarah, before gently placing his coffee down.
‘Is that everything?’ the waitress asked him.
‘Perfect, thanks, Luna.’ He didn’t look at her this time, too busy scrolling through his camera roll.
Luna faltered, her smile fading, and Sarah almost felt sorry for her.
‘Here,’ he said, holding his phone out to Sarah.
She could tell instantly it was one of Fionn’s paintings. If Sarah had spent her life trying to make the sea true on the page, then Fionn had attempted to do the same with the sky: swashes of inky blacks and midnight blues. His paintings were intense to look at, as if you were being swallowed whole, the paint swirling in your mouth and crawling up your nose until you thought you might suffocate in the world he had created.
‘Sure, there he is,’ Sarah said, but she looked away from the photo as soon as possible.
‘Isn’t it incredible? This fantastic place called Galerie Thaddaeus Ropac had a piece of his in an exhibition of up-and-coming artists. If you’re ever in Paris, you should check it out.’
‘If I’m ever in Paris?’
‘Yeah. You’d love this gallery. Sofia Coppola was a guest curator a few years ago.’
‘Did you go to Pere Lachaise again?’
‘What?’
‘Pere Lachaise?’ Sarah asked again, but his face was blank.
‘Did you buy anything by Fionn?’ she tried. ‘Or is it still only the one piece you have?’
‘I bought this one,’ he replied. ‘It was cheap as chips, really, especially compared to the Oonagh MacManus I bought the day before. I was afraid Flo was going to demand extra child maintenance when she saw the price of it.’ He took another sip of coffee.
‘What do you think of MacManus? I know some people say it’s just hype, that she’s more ideology than actual talent, but her work never decreases in value, does it?’
‘That’s weird that you would mention Oonagh.’
‘Why so?’
‘I’m dating her son,’ she said, watching him carefully.
‘They’re popular in Ireland,’ he said. ‘Playing Vicar Street and small pubs down the country. They’re not going to set the world on fire, are they?’
‘I don’t know,’ Sarah said. ‘Anyway, that’s Domhnall. I’m with Oisin, his older brother.’
‘Very good.’ He caught the waitress’s eye and made a scribbling motion in the air: Bill, please. ‘That’s why you’re here, is it?’
‘What?’
‘Are you here to see the Wilsons?’ he asked. ‘She’s an attractive woman, isn’t she? Still has it, even at her age. I met her when we sold them that house in Killiney.’ He shuddered.
‘What a monstrosity. It’s like something an itinerant would buy after they won the lotto.’
That’s not funny, she would have said to anyone else, but he would have laughed at her. So Sarah stayed quiet and giggled, a high-pitched noise that announced what an easy girl she was – an easy, lovely girl. Sarah had always done that with him and she had always hated herself for it afterwards.
The waitress brought the bill and he insisted on paying.
‘Don’t be going on with that feminist nonsense, Sarah,’ he said, ushering her outside into the sunshine, his hand in the small of her back, and she fought the urge to lean against him and murmur her thanks. She wasn’t allowed to do that anymore.
‘Well, look who it is.’ A short, balding man was walking towards them, overdressed for the heat in a royal-blue suit.
‘Michael Gleeson, how the hell are you?’ He moved away from Sarah to shake the other man’s hand.
‘I’m good, I’m good,’ Michael said, wiping sweat off his brow. ‘How was Paris? Florence told Yvonne that you went shopping. Naughty, naughty.’
‘I did. They’ll sell on well, particularly the MacManus.
How’s Noah?’
‘Ah, he’s grand.’
The two men talked about Harry and Noah, how relieved they were that Transition Year was over and the boys were finished with work experience and mini-companies and trips to Kolkata to feed starving children in slums. Yvonne was sick of having to chauffeur Noah around to rugby training and to the Wes and she couldn’t wait until Noah had his full driving licence, but then you worry about boy racers, don’t you? Almost makes you wish you had a girl.
Finally, all talk of Noah’s rugby kicking technique exhausted, Michael nodded his head at Sarah. ‘And who’s this?’ He didn’t remember her, Sarah realised, even though she had taught Noah for two years at St Finbarr’s before she left.
‘This is Sarah Fitzpatrick,’ he told Michael. ‘She’s a friend of mine and an artist. You should keep an eye out for her.’
I’m not an artist, Sarah thought. Artists create art. Sarah’s art was trapped in her fingertips, like dirt gathering beneath her nails.
‘Just a friend?’ Michael winked at him.
‘Behave yourself, Gleeson,’ he replied. ‘Sarah is involved with Oonagh MacManus’s son.’
‘Oonagh MacManus?’ Michael said. ‘I’ve been trying to get in contact with her for months but her agent is so bloody over-protective. Will you give her this, the next time you see her?’
He handed Sarah a business card, silver font on green.
‘My gallery is on Kildare Street.’
‘I know where it is,’ Sarah said, and she could hear how coarse her accent was, how country, Dunfinnan strangling her vowels.
‘Kevin’s place is only a few doors down.’
‘Kevin Walsh? How’d you know him?’
‘I’m friends with his boyfriend.’
‘Ah, Robbie, of course,’ Michael said. ‘Does that mean you know Fionn McCarthy as well?’
‘Sarah and Fionn went to Dublin Art College together,’ he interrupted, and Michael whistled.
‘You know all the important people, Miss Sarah Fitzpatrick,’ he said.
His phone beeped and he pulled it out of his pocket, grimacing as he read the text. ‘I’d better go; the wife is looking for me,’ Michael said.
‘You’re a lucky man; no ball and chain for you, is there?’
He laughed. ‘Good to see you, Michael. Tell Yvonne I send my regards.’
‘I will, of course,’ Michael said. ‘And nice to meet you, Sarah. Stay out of trouble.’
He waited until Michael was out of sight before he took a step towards her.
‘Stay out of trouble? You?’ he said. ‘Never.’
He was getting old, Sarah realised, the creases around his eyes cut deep, his teeth almost yellow in his thin-lipped smile. He was forty-seven now, and he looked every year of it. What was Sarah doing here?
The wind blew her hair over her face and he brushed it away.
‘You dyed it.’ His voice was surprised, as if he had only noticed now.
‘Yes.’ Blonde. I dyed it blonde, like you preferred.
‘It suits you,’ he said. ‘But, listen, I have to go. Duty calls. Do you need a lift to the Wilsons’ place?’
‘I’m grand,’ she said. ‘Thanks, anyway.’
‘Be good, Sarah,’ he said, walking away from her. She waited for him to turn around and look at her, one last time.
But he didn’t.
Matthew, she thought.
Matthew. Matthew. Matthew.
This is an extract from Almost Love by Louise O'Neill. Almost Love is out on 1st March in hardback, £14.99, published by riverrun. ISBN: 9781784298869.
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Mahny Djahanguiri, the founder of DogaMahny, presses her hand to her heart as I thank her for the class I have just taken, a 90-minute "doga" beginners' session. “You have to experience doga to really get it,” she says, as she pulls me into a lovely big hug. “Really, there are no words.”
In Mahny’s book, she describes doga as “a symbiotic bonding exercise [between the dog and owner] using the ancient tradition of yoga”. The class I had just been to was a mixture of first-timers, journalists and regular enthusiasts. And that was just the humans. Also in attendance were about 15 dogs of all types and sizes.
I, like much of the population, am borderline-obsessed with dogs. I’m that person who stares at dogs on the Tube, like a deranged canine snatcher. I’m that person in the pub who makes everyone uncomfortable by approaching total strangers and going, “Awww, can I say hello to your dog?” I am on BorrowMyDoggy. I went to the pug café. However, for a variety of very practical and grown-up reasons, I don’t own a dog myself and this is a source of constant pain and regret. Luckily, for the purposes of dog yoga, my friend Steph was very happy to lend me her dog, Bramble. Bramble lives in the countryside and is a working cocker spaniel, more accustomed to fetching dead pheasants from across muddy farmland than taking part in a dog yoga class in Shoreditch. So going to doga would be a new experience for us both.
To kick things off, Mahny tells us to arrange our mats in a circle; this, she explains, will create a safe space for the dogs. “We’re a pack,” she says, casting her arms wide in a gesture of welcome to humans and dogs alike. We close our eyes and Mahny leads a chant. Bramble, meanwhile, is running around the room in a maniacal fashion, pursued by a corgi and a scruffy terrier. I half-open one eye just in time to see her career into the legs of a photographer, who stumbles slightly, looking alarmed. “Do not attempt to control your dog,” Mahny calls from the centre of the circle. “Let go.”
Afterwards, we begin a breathing exercise. Sitting cross-legged, we stick out our tongues, dog-like, and pant while Mahny admonishes us for our British reserve. “Don’t be shy! Really stick those tongues out!” Bramble, returning from her investigation of the shoe rack, stands squarely in front of me, staring in a way that I can’t help but interpret as mocking. “Expect licks in the face,” warns Mahny, “as your dogs start to engage with us and pick up on our energy. They will absorb our calm.” Sure enough, Bramble jumps up, pushing her face into mine, perhaps suspecting that I have lost my mind. Around the room, dogs return to their owners and slowly a spooky stillness descends.
As we go into downward-facing dog, I close my eyes and attempt to enter the moment, but my zen-like calm is disrupted by my friend Lisa, who despite being a far more experienced yoga practitioner than me, has nevertheless allowed herself to be distracted by something and has begun to giggle uncontrollably. I turn to see two small dogs enthusiastically humping, inches from Lisa’s face. Luckily for Lisa, everybody moving into boat pose proves adequately diverting and the canine couple, suddenly indifferent to one another, trot off in opposite directions.
“If your dog is near you, and if they want to join you, take your dog onto your lap as we hold boat pose,” instructs Mahny. Bramble has, in fact, been sitting at the end of my yoga mat for the past 10 minutes, looking back and forth from me to the rest of the room in complete bafflement. However, as other dogs hop onto their owners' laps, Bramble gets the picture and dutifully joins in, sitting on me quietly as I, woefully inflexible and severely lacking in core strength, struggle to hold the pose.
As the class ends, we lie on our backs and picture ourselves rooted to the Earth. Mahny says that she will sound a bell, signalling a moment of outer-body serenity. The dogs, evidently interpreting the bell differently, immediately start to bark en masse.
It takes about three or four sessions, Mahny says, for the dogs to become accustomed to doga. I did have fun, and I think Bramble did too, extreme confusion aside. Having dogs suddenly crash into you while you balance on one leg is distracting and if you’re a serious yogi looking to perfect your destroyer of the universe pose, doga might not be for you – but then that was probably already obvious.
What I love about dogs is their perfect mixture of uncanny intelligence and remarkable idiocy, their relentless ability to live in the moment (very zen) and their unwavering sincerity. Doga brought all that out, and then some. I felt quite silly, if I’m being truthful, but if Bramble thought as much, she definitely didn’t care.
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Puffer jackets have reigned supreme for some time now, and this winter you'll want to wrap up yet again in the cosiest and comfiest outerwear of all.
The jacket, popular back in the '80s and '90s before becoming synonymous with ski dads and tourists, was revived on the catwalks of AW16 by Demna Gvasalia for his debut at Balenciaga. Parading an off-the-shoulder siren-red number over a grey roll-neck, a thousand street stylers followed suit, pointedly shrugging off their padded jackets. Gvasalia's love for the puffer didn't end with the warmer weather, though; for SS17, sleeveless gilet puffers with extended collars were presented in black and sunshine yellow, before AW17's muted Queen Elizabeth-inspired offering, paired with a tweed knee-length skirt and matching headscarf.
Balenciaga wasn't the only fashion house to bring the puffer in from the cold during AW16. Stella McCartney gave us luxurious velvet finishes and quilted jackets, while Phillip Lim turned out city-suitable cropped pieces. Pucci delivered epic mountain scenes on longer coats, and Acne Studios dished up '90s nostalgia via low-slung trousers and cropped red puffers.
Fast-forward to this season and what's changed? The puffer is now more considered, with off-kilter shapes, vibrant prints and tactile fabrics providing a refresh. Fenty x Puma combined the outerwear of the season with the print du jour – check – in an ankle-skimming, almost-a-duvet number. Philipp Plein and Kenzo's take on the puffer came in oil-slick high shine, and Eudon Choi created a masterful hybrid of the classic parka and puffer.
If you associate the jacket with athleisure or streetwear, think again. This season's puffers look as brilliant over Ganni's floral midi dresses as they do with kick flare denim and a trusty knit. And did we mention you won't find a cosier coat? Click through to see our pick of the puffers to see you through the coldest months.
The piece that started it all.
Balenciaga Oversized Quilted Shell Down Jacket, £2,050, available at Net-A-Porter
90's streetwear meets Scandic-chic in this colourful number from Monki.
When it comes to mental health, the facts and figures tell us a lot.
In the UK about one in six people will need treatment for mental ill health during their lifetime and it is estimated that at some time during their life, about one in 100 people will suffer an episode of schizophrenia.
At any one time, about 220,000 people are being treated for schizophrenia by the NHS, yet the illness is still a killer. Sufferers have a 5-10% chance of dying by their own hand within 10 years of diagnosis, which is around two and a half times higher than the general population. Schizophrenia strikes most often in late teens and early 20s, and slightly later in women than in men.
But the statistics don't tell us everything, and stigma and misunderstanding about schizophrenia is rife, as three women who have the illness told us. Here they describe when they got their diagnosis, what it really feels like to hear voices in your head, and how we can better help friends and family who have mental health problems.
Alice Evans, 40
I first began to have symptoms of my condition at around the age of 19 or 20. I had been depressed for a while (since the age of 16) and my depression led on to having symptoms of schizoaffective disorder. I started hearing voices, seeing things that other people couldn’t see and losing concentration and motivation. I felt very low and had thoughts at times of taking my own life.
I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder at around age 30. I had moved away from home to start art school in London and I went to see a psychiatrist. I had been experiencing a very low mood and what is termed psychosis. I was experiencing both delusions and hallucinations.
The lowest point was really some time before this when I had gone to visit a friend in the USA and started being unwell in another country. My mum had to come and collect me and take me back to the UK as I was not well enough to fly unaccompanied. When I got a bit better and realised how much it had cost my mum to collect me, I felt awful.
My family have stuck with me through the most difficult of times. They have been incredibly supportive and I feel extremely lucky to have them around. The experience of schizoaffective disorder can be incredibly isolating. When I was first unwell many people didn’t understand what was happening to me and avoided me, which tended to make the feeling of isolation significantly worse. I think the stigma attached to mental health conditions was even more profound then and many had very closed minds and didn’t understand how to be kind. Things are gradually improving in some ways but much more still needs to be done.
Now things are getting better. I’m beginning to enjoy life. I’m running a business taking photographs alongside working as a visual artist. The work I make is largely film and poetry. I’m pursuing a PhD in filmmaking and am trying to get my life together. I work in schools to try to combat the stigma attached to having mental health conditions. I make artwork and poetry now, which sometimes reflects on my experiences of psychosis.
The greatest thing that has helped my symptoms improve is finding a group of friends who accept me and don’t judge me having a severe mental health condition. They are kind and understanding when I am unwell. I think it helps being among the creative community as the profession is one of the places where creative thinking and difference is embraced, even valued. My friends are also pretty kind people in general and I have found somewhere where I can be accepted. I found it very difficult to maintain work in other environments because of the stigma attached to my experiences. Having a mental health condition definitely indicates who your true friends are.
One of the biggest clichés or misconceptions around schizophrenia is that it makes you violent. Violence is not a symptom of schizophrenia. People with a mental health condition are statistically more likely to be the victims of violence than the perpetrators of it. Poor reporting in the press and in TV and film often increases the stigma attached to schizophrenia by sensationalising isolated events of violence. These isolated incidents happen when the ridiculously underfunded NHS mental health services are not given the money or resources to look after or support people properly when they are severely unwell.
The last 12 months have seen really severe cuts to these services which means that people are having to travel far away from home and family in order to get support that they urgently need. This puts even greater strain on friends and family when they are already extremely concerned about their loved ones.
Personally I have always been more terrified of other people than they ever could be of me when I am experiencing psychosis. I never felt or acted violently towards another. I am far more at risk, when I am feeling very low, of hurting myself.
There is also the funny conception that people with a mental health condition such as schizoaffective disorder are either geniuses or extremely stupid. This is often the way they seem to be portrayed in films. In reality, we can lead fulfilling lives but need more help and support to achieve what people can take for granted such as maintaining employment, having a romantic partner or, in the most difficult times, remembering to wash and dress.
I have been lucky enough to access therapy and this has also helped me make sense of some of the more traumatic aspects to having a severe mental health condition. Even though I sometimes find that I may have different thinking and behaviours to others, this has helped me in some way make sense of that. In some ways the hallucinations and delusions take away from the person experiencing them because it is not something other people can accept or share. The lack of shared narratives with others can make the condition extremely socially isolating. Having therapy has helped me come to terms with this and helps me manage my condition.
Living with a mental health condition can change from day to day. Sometimes it feels as if my own mind is causing extreme pain and distress and in those moments life feels very bleak and it is hard to see ahead. When I am well I value pretty much every moment of life because I’ve seen such difficult things that even the mundane stuff seems joyful.
My advice for everyone really, not specific to those with a mental health condition, is above all else be kind. You don’t know what anyone is dealing with in life and try not to patronise or underestimate. Also try and call or visit people you know with a mental health condition. Don’t give them a cold shoulder. If people are too unwell to make conversation or take visits, then try to support the people caring for them. It can be a very lonely experience for all concerned if we don’t care for each other.
Theresa Duncan, 24
I began to have symptoms in June 2017. I experienced hallucinations. I wasn't making sense in my speech. I had delusions of reality, confusion and was hearing voices. I was diagnosed with schizophrenia in September 2017. I began to have suicidal thoughts and attempted suicide leading up to the diagnosis. I felt at my lowest when I attempted suicide, which was in August 2017. My thoughts became irrational and I felt very emotional and lonely.
My friends and family have been extremely supportive, my father in particular. They visited me at the mental health hospital during my recovery and diagnosis, and have been very close to me. A great family support network and a good aftercare team has made living with schizophrenia easier.
Now things are getting back to normal, I have just got back into work again and doing things that I love. I love writing poetry, I have just published a book called Captive Release where I describe and speak about my psychotic episodes and delusions.
There is a stigma and a misconception around schizophrenia. There are people that think it is a negative thing, that people who have it are socially incapable of living in normal society. We can change them by educating ourselves more about the illness and see how people are truly affected by the condition.
It is a bit strange having a new diagnosis such as this. I take my recovery day by day – with the medication and therapy and psychology sessions, it can seem like an overload at times so it can be difficult to juggle.
Schizophrenia is a mental illness that can make you feel confused about reality, see things that aren’t there, and hear voices that other people cannot hear. It isn’t something that people should be afraid of or dismiss. It could happen to anyone at any time.
Kerry Martin, 34
I got my diagnosis for schizophrenia about five or six years ago, but I've had mental health problems in one shape or another since I was quite young. The first time I was in hospital was when I was 15.
When I was a teenager, I was getting extremely badly bullied in school to the point that I literally wouldn't talk to anyone outside my immediate family for a month at a time. Even though I was going to school, no one there would speak to me and I was just getting more and more isolated, my home situation was quite difficult, I felt I didn't have any support and things just sort of spiralled around and around in my head until I was pretty confused about what was real and what wasn't.
Basically I had all sorts of mental health problems which generally affected my life quite badly but it kept being put down to depression. For a lot of my 20s, I was really quite unwell. I wasn't leaving the house much, was spending most of my life in bed with a blanket over my head, wanting the world to go away. Then in my late 20s, I was assaulted, a whole lot of things went wrong and I ended up in hospital where I eventually got diagnosed with psychosis. I got referred to the Insight Team for psychosis for the first time who were fantastic and really helped me turn my life around, got me on track to a place where I was able to do a bachelor's degree. Since then I've got married, I'm working, life is pretty good again.
Before that, life was very confusing. On a good day then I could be out and about and see friends, but good days were just coming less and less often and I was spending more time stuck at home, trapped with the ideas in my head and with voices.
I spent a lot of time feeling very guilty about things that couldn't possibly be my fault. Things like earthquakes, natural disasters, I was connecting them with myself in ways that wouldn't have made sense to anyone on the outside. For example, I thought sometimes, if I got out of bed, it might cause an earthquake on the other side of the world, so I'd just curl up in a ball and try to stay really still. And that was terrifying because my full diagnosis is schizoaffective disorder, it's a mix of schizophrenia and bipolar, so as well as hearing voices and getting unusual ideas, I also get moods that go high and low. Being manic isn't nearly as fun as it sounds because a lot of people think, yeah that sounds great, you think you're rich and famous and whatever, but for me it was like, 'If I've got all these superpowers, why is the world still such a shit place? Clearly it's all my fault and it's all my responsibility to sort out and I need to do something to stop all these millions of people dying every day.'
It was terrifying. I'd think that everyone else knew about this so when I went out, then people would be watching me in the street and looking at me and pointing and staring. And I thought that was happening because I was a terrible, evil person who was responsible for all the bad things that happened in the world.
Some people understood me, I think particularly people who've had depression because a lot of my thoughts are like depression but with big stompy boots on. Some people didn't understand. It makes me a target, because people have a lot of odd ideas about what people with schizophrenia or people who hear voices are like. I've had people say I'm violent or dangerous or scary or lying about things, or can't be trusted, and none of it's true. The risk factor for violence for people who hear voices is the same as for everyone else.
There's a stigma about schizophrenia in particular, and psychosis, that really gets me. The terms get used in almost a jokey way, in a sort of horror/asylum/madhouse/Halloween way, it's almost like people don't think they're a real thing that happens to real people. I know people who have been diagnosed by a psychiatrist for a decade or two and still say, 'Well I can't possibly have that because that would mean I'm a terrifying axe murderer', when that's clearly not what the psychiatrist means, it's just a description of an illness, but that's what using these terms, even in fun, as a synonym for 'freak show' does to people.
For me now, it's almost like a bad day these days is what a good day used to be. I'm married, I work as a researcher around mental health and I have two gorgeous pet rabbits who are a joy. My rabbits are called Nye Bevan and Edith Cavell, named after famous people in the history of public health. I have lots of hobbies, I go running, I genuinely have a life now and it's so much better than things used to be. I put a lot of that down to having really good support from the NHS early intervention Insight Team for psychosis services, they absolutely helped me turn my life around and kept telling me that even though I was still having problems, I could have a good life around that and I could manage. I'm pretty upset that over the last few years, we've seen a lot of cuts to the NHS, mental health has been hit particularly badly by this and I'm concerned that those services won't be there anymore for the people who need them. So I still want people to reach out and to talk to people but also campaign to make the support available.
There is hope. A lot of mental health conditions are very treatable and some of them you can be completely better within a year or so and some of them, even if you're not completely better, like my voices, you can learn to have a pretty good life. I do a lot of health economics and we know that every £1 spent on early intervention in psychosis services saves about £9 over the next five years across all sorts of different services, but it's still an upfront payment system and the money is just not there. And that doesn't even make any financial sense, never mind the huge human cost of people having their life ruined.
One thing I'd say to people who maybe know someone experiencing mental health problems: You don't have to be an expert to make a lot of difference in someone's life, you just have to be a friend. And even if you can't solve all their problems, that's fine, just try and carry on keeping the person involved in things they went to before and encouraging them to do things that are part of normal life for them. When I become unwell, I tend to isolate myself so I get out of touch with people and eventually then some people will stop asking me to things because I never come. It is important to keep on trying to stay in contact with your friends, and encourage them, because when they start getting better, that'll be a really important part of their recovery.
If you are experiencing mental health issues and need support,contact Rethink
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Ah, spring. It's a time of year when the winter doldrums can seem overwhelming; the excitement of the Christmas holidays has passed, but summer is still comically far-off. But that also makes it the perfect time to travel. After all, there's nothing like a change of scenery plus a little R & R to help you shake those winter blues.
And if the words "spring break" summon images of dilapidated beachside crash pads and cheap tequila, forget what you know. Whether you're looking for a quiet and sunny oasis or a lively cosmopolitan city, there are plenty of awesome spots for a more refined spring break getaway. Here are 15 of them.
Berlin, Germany Nightlife, European history, really clean public transportation: Berlin has it all. Book a room in one of the many minimalist hotels that dot the city, like Hotel Q! in the Kurfürstendamm neighbourhood, known as Berlin’s Champs-Élysées for its scenic boulevards and designer shops. A short walk way, you can explore the Tiergarten, an urban park perfect for picnicking, biking, and visiting some of the city's oldest monuments.
Or, hop on the U-Bahn, the city’s metro system, and go deeper into the Mitte (the city centre). Check out the flea markets, record stores, and independent boutiques as well as the "Museum Island” in the middle of the Spree river, home to archaeological treasures from around the globe.
Spend the day exploring Kreuzberg-Friedrichshain for Turkish food, street art, and the remains of the Berlin Wall. After a day of exploring, rest up and then hit one of Berlin’s famous nightclubs, like Barbie Deinhoff’s, a Barbie-themed club with bright-pink fluorescent lights, cheap drinks, and thumping music that will keep you dancing until dawn.
Photo: Alex Segre/REX/Shutterstock.
Monterey, California If you’re interested in gorgeous views and rambling day hikes, but not so into leaving civilisation behind, check out Monterey. This charming seaside town, located about an hour south of the Bay Area, proves that Californians take their leisure time seriously. Attractions include the world-famous Pebble Beach golf course, plus spas, parks, and wineries galore.
There are plenty of inexpensive hotels in the area, but, if you can, splurge on a room in the heart of the city, like Monterey Plaza. Not only will you be within walking distance of adorable shops and restaurants, you’ll have a front row seat to those glorious Pacific sunsets.
Photo: Steve Rapport/REX/Shutterstock.
Harbour Island, Bahamas It's called the Nantucket of the Caribbean for good reason. After you've made the connection to North Eleuthera Airport and arrived via water taxi, you'll immediately understand why the likes of Diane von Furstenberg and Barry Diller, J.Crew CEO Mickey Drexler, and Bill Gates have chosen Harbour Island as their home away from home.
Pilot your golf cart — there are no cars here — past the rows of soft-hued, eighteenth-century cottages and around the free-roaming chickens as you make your way to the island's famed, pink-sand beaches, and thank your lucky stars
Patagonia, Chile It's time to head south. Way, way south.
Break up your journey to Punta Arenas — a gateway to Patagonia — with a stopover in Santiago (the Los Angeles of South America); there, you'll find the first of many drop-dead-gorgeous views of the Andes. Head to Santiago Metropolitan Park (Chile's version of Runyon Canyon) for a warmup hike and funicular ride, followed by dinner and a nightcap in the hip Providencia and Bellas Artes districts. (If you have time for excursions, Valparaíso, the seaport home city of beloved Chilean poet Pablo Neruda, is an easy 90-minute bus ride from Santiago.) Then, head the airport for your real adventure to begin.
After touching down in Punta Arenas, take a relaxing stroll through Plaza Muñoz Gamero, hike to the top of Cruz Hill, and then settle in for the evening at La Marmita for some classic Chilean fare. Penguin-lovers, take note: The southern city is also the launchpad for ferries that cross the Strait of Magellan, famous for its colony of tuxedo-feathered birds.
Reykjavík, Iceland If the idea of all-night dancing at a Euro-style discotheque appeals to you more than an afternoon of baking in the sun, then this northern party capital should rank high on your list of must-visits.
The Icelandic city really caters to the venue-hopping crowd: Its hot spots (like longtime staple Kaffibarinn) line one thoroughfare, and they stay open till the wee hours of the morning every Thursday through Sunday.
When you want to lay down your dancing shoes, hop on a 45-minute bus to the world-famous steaming Blue Lagoon Geothermal Spa. Not only are its mineral-rich waters warm enough for year-round swimming, but the silica mud will do wonders for your skin. Oh, and did we mention the in-lagoon bar?
Belize If you can't decide between the beach or the rainforest, well, go ahead and choose both.
This Eden-like locale is within easy reach of the East Coast and features plenty of rustic-luxe, eco-minded boutique hotels; for beach-goers, we're fans of private retreat Cayo Espanto and the El Secreto' s romantic villas. If you're looking for an unobstructed view that's bursting with wildlife — we're talking leggy egrets and herons, howler monkeys, and an array of wild cats (think pumas, ocelots, jaguarundis, margays, and jaguars) — post up in one of the jungle-style abodes at the Gaïa River Lodge.
The coral reefs just offshore also make Belize's beaches the perfect launch points for skindiving and snorkeling enthusiasts. What's better than a holiday where all you really need is a bathing suit?
Halifax, Nova Scotia Endless fair-trade coffee, harbour cruises, whale watching, and lobster: If you think Halifax sounds like an incredible mashup of other brisk cities like Portland, Boston, and San Francisco, you’re right.
The bohemian city, which typically starts to warm up (with temperatures into the 50s) in mid-to-late April, not only has laid-back hipness to spare, but also boasts quite a rich history. Its Maritime Museum of the Atlantic is a must-visit, with shipwrecked relics, including some from the Titanic.
Adventurous visitors can jaunt to Prince Edward Island, and explore the candlepin bowling and friendly social clubs that stand in for city pubs. If you're really lucky, you may even spot a moose.
Bogotá, Colombia Amble the wide carreras and cobblestone calles of historic district La Candelaria, where you’ll find rows of pastel colonial homes, laid-back coffee shops and cafés, and a vibrant arts scene. Though the Botero Museum is more famous, the Museo del Oro is a must — plus, it offers some English-language tours.
At night, head north to Zona Rosa — a.k.a. "The T Zone" — where the vast number of restaurants, cocktail bars, and designer shops will have you thinking you're right at home. If you're feeling brave (and ready to party), try chicha, the city’s signature (and quite strong) maize libation. If you don't want to be nursing a hangover while summiting Monserrate the next morning (who could leave Colombia without seeing those views!?), stick to the trusty coca sour, a South American delicacy.
San Miguel de Allende, Mexico Nestled in the mountains just northwest of Mexico City is a onetime silver-mining settlement turned midcentury expat art colony, best known for its spring-all-year weather and über-charming streets. Picture cobblestones, fuchsia bougainvillea, and homes festooned with brightly painted, ornately carved wooden doors.
Behind the vine-covered walls are open-air courtyards equally perfect for an afternoon nap and happy hour (when you should down plenty of frothy pulques, a local libation made from the maguey plant). Get creative and take a culinary class (who doesn't want to learn the secret to a perfect tamale?), or simply visit El Tianguis, the huge, bustling Tuesday market, where you can people-watch, eat (cecina tacos!), and relish in the artistry swirling around you.
Havana, Cuba With the loosening of travel restrictions to the island nation, there's never been a better (or easier) time to visit Havana.
Sure, the city has been off-limits for some time now, but the sights and sounds still feel quite familiar (and not just from that Dirty Dancing sequel). There's live Afro-Cuban music à la Buena Vista Social Club, classic chrome-fendered American cars, and vivid graffiti and street art that offer a bright, colourful flair very few other cities can match.
Other sights to see? Pay homage to great explorers at Colon Cemetery (where many military heroes and adventurers are interred, though not Columbus himself) and dive head-first into the literary past of Ernest Hemingway at the author's former home turned museum.
Vieques, Puerto Rico Just a hop, skip, and a quick swim from tourist-overrun San Juan, this lesser-travelled isle southeast of mainland Puerto Rico truly has something for everyone. It's so beautiful, in fact, that it's hard to believe this tropical paradise was once used as a bombing range for the United States Navy (history buffs can still visit the abandoned bunkers).
Rent a Jeep and beach-hop all day long, from the more accessible (and wildly popular) Sun Bay to more rugged stretches like black-sand Playa Negra. If you're in search of an adventure, explore the primo snorkelling, kayak in the world-renowned bioluminescent bay, or take in the turquoise ocean views astride one of the island's famed roaming ponies. Foodies are also in luck. Feast on fresh seafood and the best ribs (seriously!) along Esperanza's malecón, or boardwalk, or at the famed El Quenepo — because everything tastes better when it's straight from the ocean.
Steamboat Springs, Colorado Skiers heading out West ought to keep these classic Colorado slopes in the front of their minds.
Steamboat boasts six peaks, 3,000 skiable acres, and 165 trails — not to mention its trademarked Champagne powder snow. And with shopping, renowned pre-ski brunches (biscuits and gravy at Winona's are calling your name), après-ski bars, and several hot springs close at hand, those who'd rather skip the bunny slopes can get into the spirit without even putting their feet in a pair of skis.
Little Compton, Rhode Island While summer may be the peak season for this stretch of the Atlantic just south of Cape Cod, you’ll find this beach village much more mind-restoring in the quiet spring months.
A short train ride from Providence will drop you amid the "New Hamptons" — as Little Compton has been called — and its plethora of meditative ponds, beaches, and dunes. Keep things low-key as you stroll by the ocean, troll its quaint shops for textiles and handmade jewelry, and visit its vineyards. And, if you have wheels, you can skip over to Newport to marvel at 18th-century mansions like Marble House, where Alva Vanderbilt threw her infamously lavish costume parties.
Sayulita, Mexico The alternative to hard-partying Puerto Vallarta, Sayulita lies far enough away on the crystalline Riviera Nayarit (often hailed as Mexico's perfect coastline) that you’ll be awakened by roosters and trailed by sleepy dogs as you traipse around on foot.
Despite its rural trappings, however, the tiny village hideaway is bursting with shopping potential: Try boho boutiques like Evoke the Spirit, Artefakto, and Pacha Mama for handmade jewellery, textiles, clothing, and art. And, if the local reggae scene (not to mention the ceviche-like aguachile and agave-based local spirit raicilla) is not enough for you, well, you can always hop in a cab and hit PV for a big night out.
San Juan Del Sur, Nicaragua The time to visit this expat-beloved surfer enclave on the Pacific Ocean is now. Sure, San Juan del Sur still has a sleepy-fishing-village vibe — but the quiet may not last long. Thanks to luxury resorts cropping up and expanding, and plans for a new Emerald Coast airport under way, the secret may officially be out.
Fly into Managua and make your way two hours south for ample surfing and yoga — not to mention all the simple, fresh-caught shrimp and fish at one of the city's many beachside bars — along the curve of sand framed pretty much perfectly by cliffs.
For a dose of urbanity (and revolutionary history), pull over en route to take in the scenery of the colonial city of Granada. It's no surprise it's often dubbed the Paris of Central America.
If you follow Jameela Jamil on Twitter and Instagram, you'll know she's very funny and very honest. She's also totally unafraid to call out any hypocrisy and harmful behaviour she spots.
Yesterday the TV and radio presenter (and of course, break-out star of TheGood Place) used her social media channels to call out the "toxic bullshit" that often surrounds women's weight. Sharing a screen-grab of an Instagram post which tried to estimate the body weights of the female members of the Kardashian-Jenner clan, Jamil wrote, quite rightly: "Who gives a FUCK what weight you are?"
She also shared another screen-grab from her own Instagram story in which she brilliantly flipped the conversation. Instead of weighing herself according to the number of kilograms that appear when she steps on a set of scales, Jamil weighed herself according to her achievements, values and things that give her self-worth.
She wrote: "I weigh: Lovely relationship. Great friends. I laugh every day. I love my job. I make an honest living. I'm financially independent. I speak out for women's rights. I like my bingo wings. I like myself in spite of EVERYTHING I've been taught by the media to hate myself about. F*cking KG."
She then encouraged her followers to do the same and share what they weigh in terms of achievements, values and self-worth. Check out some of the responses she got below.
I'm a doctor, and the least interesting thing about me is the number on the scales 👍 pic.twitter.com/V0lxtHNsyW
I weigh: Responsibility Empathy Social Justice Feminism Love for animals Laughter My favorite book My favorite TV shows My favorite songs Intelligence Cozy scented candles
I weigh: three languages I speak, the love of my family and friends, 3 countries I've been to, my obsession with star wars, educating myself about feminism, knowing and accepting myself, coming out to my friends, being a second mother to my younger siblings FUCKING KG!
Jamil's tweets are a reminder that nobody, whether they're in the public eye or not, should be defined by their body shape or what happens when they step on a set of weighing scales. Altogether now: "FUCKING KG!"
If you're the sort of traveller who swears by intense comparison shopping, price alerts, and only purchasing flights at midnight during a full moon cycle, consider this a warning: Airlines have found yet another way to keep you on your toes when it comes to getting the best value for your ticket.
As Travel + Leisure reports, the future of air travel could soon see the widespread introduction of "dynamic pricing," which would mean that different passengers pay different fares — and not just for the usual upgrades like extra legroom or business class seating.
Demand-based dynamic, or surge, pricing isn't necessarily new. It's why airlines hike up the cost of flights during holiday periods and peak travel times, and why Uber users pay twice as much for a ride during rush hour. But now airlines — some of which, according to Travel Weekly, have already implemented this system — are setting fares according to a passenger's personal flight history.
Say the person in 31D is a frequent flyer who enjoys cashing in miles for the occasional free flight. Over in 44F might be a new customer travelling for fun; he or she might have more flexibility in terms of travel dates and even destinations, and can thus spend more time on comparison shopping. And in 22A is a businessperson whose flight will be covered by a corporate card, with an upgrade or two possibly thrown in. For them, it's about getting from point A to point B efficiently, whatever the cost.
An airline just needs the passenger's IP address to be privy to all this information. Dynamic pricing software sets fare pricing according to an individual's search history, from which they create a personalised flight profile. That profile dictates what a passenger would pay, with loyalty programme members and those travelling for leisure rather than business potentially enjoying lower fares. Thus, the person in 22A might pay more than those in 31D or 44F, and nobody's the wiser.
The purpose of dynamic pricing is, predictably, to boost revenue for airlines. Unfortunately, budget-minded travellers who rely on tried-and-true cost-saving hacks might get lost in the process.
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Celebrities love their hair stylists, don't they? It’s not surprising that Jennifer Aniston has stood resolutely by stylist Chris McMillan since the Friends days. Her hair is deemed by many to be one of her most winning features, and McMillan played no small part in this, creating that much-copied '90s classic, ‘The Rachel’.
The two are fast friends, much like Gisele and her stylist pal Harry Josh, who looks after her sensational mane. We can only imagine that being famous makes having a hairdresser buddy almost essential, what with the cycle of fashion shows, premieres and awards ceremonies to attend, but what does the job actually entail? We asked one hair stylist with a clientele including A-list actors, TV stars and models what it’s really like...
What’s the best part of your job?
Being able to make people smile and feel good about themselves.
And the worst?
Probably the long hours and travel.
What are the grossest aspects of the job?
Sometimes a client will come in with head lice. Horrible.
Have you ever had a client throw a tantrum?
When I was first starting out there was a client who sat down at the basin, shaking and gripping the arms of her chair. She started asking a million questions about the shampoo and I snapped and said: “I’m not getting paid enough for this – just let me wash your hair!” After that she liked me and wouldn’t let anyone else touch her hair!
Do you find that your clients confide in you?
Absolutely – almost like being a psychologist, you have to make your client feel good about themselves. Plus you might be the only person they’re close to who’s not in their social circle, so they feel they can tell you anything.
What has been your career highlight?
Shooting in the Maldives... and looking after Kim Kardashian.
Do you go to celebrities’ homes to cut their hair?
Yes, all the time. I’ve been to some incredible houses – estates, really.
Have you ever had any truly horrible clients?
Yes, though only one comes to mind in all my years as a hair stylist: one very diva-ish reality TV star who, because she comes from money, decided to speak to everyone on set like they were all her personal staff. It was the rudest thing I’ve ever witnessed and I blacklisted her; I couldn’t work with her ever again.
How are you at handling diva-ish clients?
I’m actually really good! A lot of that behaviour comes from their own insecurities and you basically have to make yourself their bitch! That makes them feel safe. And at the end of the day, they’re paying you.
Do you have any hair horror stories?
A makeup artist I know was shooting on a tropical island and the model he was working with wanted to dry her hair after getting out of the water. They had a heater on set and the girl decided to dry her hair in front of it, which was a really stupid thing to do as it went up in flames. She was okay but a couple of inches got burned off.
Do you ever have to talk a client out of a bad hairstyle?
Absolutely; if a client breaks up with someone and they are emotionally traumatised, often they’ll want to cut all their hair off or go for a drastic new colour. I always talk them out of it because they’re emotional. Having a big change when you’ve been through something like that is never a good idea.
What’s your personal favourite women’s haircut?
Long and layered.
Do hair stylists ever give each other cuts?
Yes. I have a very conservative haircut and in the early noughties another stylist offered to give me a trim. I sat there watching my hair go flying off and when he was done I had a sort of mohawk/mullet. It was really bad because I couldn’t even say anything, he just went ahead and did it.
Do you ever give your friends free haircuts?
No. I’m generally so tired after work that the last thing I want to do is someone’s hair.
What are your working hours like?
I did a TV commercial recently and it was a 14-hour day. Standing on concrete killed my feet. It's exhausting but it’s very varied – sometimes I’ll be working with a client for a red carpet event, other times it’s commercials, or shoots. I love it all and love the variety.
Do you have a famous celeb client at the moment?
Yes, but I can’t tell you.
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If you've ever found yourself rushing to the loo with an overflowing tampon emergency or woken up in the morning to find that, despite your giant sanitary towel, blood has still managed to get on your pyjamas and bedsheets, then I feel you.
When I was 24 I was diagnosed with womb cancer, which caused me to have extremely heavy periods and bleed between cycles. My periods often lasted 7-10 days and I had to wear sanitary pads in between, ‘just in case’ of an unexpected blood explosion. I'd bleed during sex, where I found that nothing kills the mood quite like needing to clean up immediately after finishing. Before my diagnosis I needed the largest tampons and a nighttime sanitary towel, which needed changing every hour. I had to set alarms throughout the night to wake up and change.
During this time, there were some very un helpful things I found out. Like that there are only so many pairs of pyjamas you can wear in a week before running out. Also, that public toilets seem to be a thing of the past, because they’re never around when you need them.
I am now period- (and cancer-) free following a hysterectomy last June, which was no fun at 24, before having had a family. Something I had always seen for myself is now, sadly, no longer a possibility. But while my years of bleeding are over, yours are not. And from my three long, painful years spent dealing with such heavy bleeds, I also learned some very help ful things about managing high-maintenance periods – and I’m here to pass them on to you.
Click through to read my best advice.
How to get blood out of absolutely anything
Blood is terrible for staining clothes and once the stain has survived a hot machine wash it's almost impossible to remove. Don’t worry though, I found a low-cost easy option for removing blood from just about anything: shampoo!
If possible, try to clean the blood before it’s dried, although this trick still works well if that isn’t possible. Hand-wash the stain with only cold water and shampoo. Blood is organic and full of proteins, and proteins bind with heat, so a hot wash will cement the blood in the fibres and make the stain all kinds of stubborn.
Once you have hand-washed most of the stain out, put the item on the coldest washing machine cycle with biological washing powder (biological powder is packed full of enzymes that naturally break down proteins), et voilà! If the stain is especially stubborn and on white fabric, bicarbonate of soda works as a natural bleach. Simply rub some into the damp stain and leave to soak, or put a few spoons in the machine drawer, remembering to put it through an extra rinse to get the bicarb out fully. I have successfully removed a lot of blood from my clothes using this method, and it has never failed me.
Get to know your (XXXL) sanitary wear
No matter how prepared I felt I was, somehow I always managed to find myself out with the one bag I owned that wasn't overflowing with spare tampons. I lost count of the amount of times I had to buy a new packet of tampons, which are exceedingly expensive (being a luxury item and all), when I had a million everywhere else. To save some money on all that tax, head to Costco and buy in bulk. Keep them in your drawer at work, in every single handbag, in your bathroom, bedroom…
For me, the largest-size Tampax with accompanying large Always towel was a must. And believe me; applicators are your best friend! If you bleed heavily, you do not want your finger up there because it will be messy, and you will have leakage.
However, if you need as many tampons as I did, that’s a lot of plastic applicators in the bin, so think environmentally friendly and search out the old-style cardboard ones. They are fairly hard to find, so head to a larger supermarket or Boots or Superdrug, as they stock them.
Better yet, use a Mooncup. I haven’t tried one so can’t give a personal account, but I’ve heard great things. One Mooncup will last you several years – so they're very environmentally friendly – and they hold three times more blood than a regular tampon, which could help save you precious hours between toilet runs.
Keep a period first aid kit at work
We’ve already covered the tampon situ but in times of menstruation, a first aid kit is needed. I’m talking about the extra period paraphernalia: painkillers, a hot water bottle, chocolate, and clean pants. Don’t waste your time with expensive branded painkillers – it's all the same stuff and that extra caffeine they add to paracetamol will just heighten your menstrual angst. If your cramps or headache won’t budge, taking two paracetamol and one ibuprofen (or vice versa) does the trick. They work on different nociceptors (pain receptors) so are safe to take at the same time.
I found using a microwaveable beanbag preferable to a standard hot water bottle; they keep a comfortable temperature for longer and you avoid those first 10 minutes of scalding yourself. Mine was genuinely a big fluffy cow named Daisy; other grown-up versions are available. Don't worry about looking silly with a hot water bottle at work. Generally most people know that a hot water bottle means ‘period’ and any awkward men (who by this point should be grown-up enough to deal) won’t dare comment.
Eat lots of iron
If you suffer from heavy periods it is really important to get lots of iron in your diet. Iron is essential for producing red blood cells, which transport oxygen around your body to keep your organs ticking over nicely. It is quite common to suffer from anaemia (low haemoglobin/red blood cells) when you bleed excessively, which reduces the amount of oxygen your body gets and causes you to feel lightheaded, fatigued, and short of breath. Foods with a high iron content include red meat, leafy vegetables, legumes (lentils, etc), shellfish and fortified cereals. One way to get a huge boost of iron without having to radically change your diet is to fit in a daily spinach smoothie. My personal favourite recipe is a dream, and with only a few ingredients it’s cheap, easy and tastes delicious. To make it, just whizz up the following:
Tons of spinach (fresh or frozen) Milk of choice – I’m partial to almond Any variety of green apple Cinnamon
Keep a period diary
I don’t mean go all Bridget Jones and detail the amount of wine and chocolate you’ve consumed. Instead, record when your periods are, how long they are, how heavy they are, and any other period-related symptoms. If your periods seem to be changing from what is normal for you, it could be caused by a variety of gynaecological health issues, which you need to be able to spot and tell your doctor. Chances are it’s nothing serious but you could be suffering from anything from polycystic ovaries to a gynaecological cancer.
If you go to your GP fully informed about your bleeding patterns, you’ll be in a good place to get the correct diagnostic tests from them and sort out any problems. The Eve Appeal recommends you go to the doctor if you're suffering from: abnormal vaginal bleeding (any bleeding post-menopause, between periods or after sex), abnormal discharge, unusual lumps and/or itching around your vagina or vulva, persistent bloating, or pain/discomfort during sex.
Jordan B Peterson is professor of psychology at the University of Toronto and "internet controversialist". He is very macho and was raised in "the frigid wastelands of Northern Alberta". He enjoys flying stunt planes and has little time for snowflakes, Marxists, postmodernists or gender fluidity. The subtitle of his book, 12 Rules For Life, is An Antidote To Chaos – for him, order is masculine and chaos is feminine – and 80% of his online following is male. He is 55, married with children, and Christian. Canada’s media have called him an "intellectual snake oil salesman" and "prophet for profit".
His book, which his publishers say provides “profound and practical principles for how to live a meaningful life”, has been likened by one reviewer to "being shouted at by a rugby coach in a sarong ". But could this be what we need? Do we need to pull ourselves together, stop quibbling, and get a grip? Having ploughed through almost 400 pages of -ologies – psychology, theology, anthropology, mythology, zoology – allow me to road test the 12 Rules for you. How does the world according to “YouTube’s new father figure” work for a feminist?
The brains of loser lobsters dissolve. Don’t be a loser lobster – stand up straight, project dominance. Women love dominance, says Peterson, which is why Fifty Shades of Grey was a bestseller. “To stand up straight with your shoulders back is to accept the terrible responsibilities of life, with eyes wide open,” he writes. “It means deciding to voluntarily transform the chaos of potential into the realities of habitable order…and accepting the end of the unconscious paradise of childhood.”
I think he is talking to millennial males here, but I have so got this. I stand so straight my shoulder blades almost meet in the middle. As a self-employed freelancer balancing a single parent household on my nose, my entire existence is not so much transformation of chaos into order, but ongoing chaos management; the second I stop accepting the terrible responsibilities of teenagers, dogs, tax returns and gas bills, everything collapses. So don’t talk to me about responsibility, Jordan B Peterson. When it comes to manning up, I am a silverback gorilla. With ovaries.
The pursuit of happiness is futile. You need to consider instead "what would be truly good for you". "Don’t underestimate the power of vision and direction," he says, quoting Nietzsche: "He whose life has a why can bear almost any how."
Understood. I should choose direction and meaning over cash and glory. So I shall continue to write novels that may or may not sell, because there is more personal satisfaction in these pursuits than being an arms dealer or a hedge fund manager. Although far less money.
This is almost self-explanatory but Peterson's argument in a nutshell is surround yourself with people who will support your "upward aim", not people who want to do the opposite of what you want.
Basically avoid the type of person that would offer a former smoker a cigarette, or a former alcoholic a beer. They will drag you down. Did we really need to be told that?
Peterson urges us to avoid the compare and despair loop. “You no longer have to be envious…you no longer have to be frustrated, because you have learned to aim low and be patient… You are less concerned with the actions of other people, because you have plenty to do yourself.”
Fifteen years ago I was a fat, depressed, celibate, unpublished, alcoholic smoker. Today I am a fat, happy, non-celibate, published, non-alcoholic ex-smoker. That’s all the comparison I will ever need. As you can also see from the words ‘fifteen’ and ‘years’, it didn’t happen overnight – transformation, unless you’re a werewolf, takes time. You don’t get it from reading a book of rules promising to deliver you from ‘chaos’.
Peterson dislikes free-range parenting and says that "parents should come in pairs". Don’t, he says, be the mummy “out to produce a little God Emperor of the Universe.” That, he suggests, is "the unstated goal of many a mother, including many who consider themselves advocates for full gender equality". Today’s parents, who should be "agents of discipline, order and conventionality" are "terrified by their children".
As a mother AND a lone parent, my initial reaction contains many swear words. Although the core idea – don’t let your kids be brats or everyone will hate them and they’ll grow up to be unself-aware losers – is basic common sense, the idea of being “an agent of order and conventionality” sounds like something straight out of Stepford. No thanks, pal. This does not mean my kids have ever been allowed to run screaming through Tesco, throw homework out the window, or smoke weed in their rooms (mine have done all of these things, but never more than once...as far as I am aware).
I’m starting to lose patience here. Perhaps he is using the word ‘perfect’ ironically, although I doubt it. Plus it’s all so damned biblical – “do only things that you could speak of with honour" – well, yes. Or as we’d say in the 21st century, don’t be a dick.
My house – literally and metaphorically –is very far from perfect order, and I am perfectly happy about this, being entirely aware of the corrosive paralysis of perfectionism. Perfect order sounds like something Captain von Trapp would advocate, along with standing up straight. Perfectionism is a disease. Give me lively, affectionate chaos any day. And from my position of functioning chaos, I will criticise the world all I damned well please, while following up the criticism with personal action. (Otherwise it’s just whining.) Be the change you want to see is not a Spotify title, but a way to live your life – imperfectly AF.
See rules one and two.
Peterson’s repackaging of the old cliché about the truth setting us free is that truth "will keep your soul from withering and dying while you encounter the inevitable tragedy of life". With epic grandiosity, he writes: “Truth builds edifices that can stand a thousand years.”
As a journalist, “at least don’t lie” is always a good place to start, especially in this era of fake news, elected liars and pretend-fabulous online lives. Of course tell the bloody truth. I also recommend vigorous swearing, as studies show that people who swear a lot are more trustworthy and authentic. Unlike this evangelical bollocks masquerading as a self-help book.
Peterson is not talking about advice (“when the person wishes you would just shut up and go away”) but the “genuine conversation” of psychotherapy. And away from the therapy room, the importance of being a good listener.
Listening means shutting up while simultaneously offering your full attention; I have learned not to butt in with sentences starting with ‘you should’ and ‘why don’t you’. Because of that people tell me their problems all the time. For one sentence at least I agree with Peterson when he says "listen to yourself, and with those whom you are speaking".
This is a rule gloriously disregarded by the author during hundreds of pages of dense verbosity, despite its innate soundness: “You have to consciously define the topic of a conversation, particularly when it is difficult – or it becomes about everything, and everything is too much.”
So when my significant other has done something to make me want to explode, instead of me incoherently screaming “Everything!” when he asks what is wrong, we sit down and have a concise, civilised discussion, where he immediately sees his error and apologises unreservedly. I may have flouted rule eight here.
Peterson means boys – whom we need to stop socialising to be "girlie men". He sees “compassion as a vice” and believes females need to be more aggressive, rather than males being less so. He blames the Terrible Oedipal Mother, paraphrasing this mythical creature addressing her son thus: “Never leave me, In return I will do everything for you, as you age without maturing, you will become worthless and bitter, but you will never have to take any responsibility, and everything you do that’s wrong will always be someone else’s fault.”
As we speak, my kids are out skateboarding in the traffic. Or maybe they’re getting drunk in a bus shelter. I wouldn’t know. I’m too busy avoiding being Oedipal, while contemplating the sheer misogyny of this esteemed academic, and his reactionary gender bias.
Life is suffering, and you need to grab joy where you can find it. Even by petting a cat in the street: “It’s a little extra light on a good day, and a tiny respite on a bad day.”
Really? I am delighted to report that my days – full to the brim of chaotic, glorious female energy – do not rely on chance encounters with unknown cats to imbue me with fleeting sensations of joy. As a long-term cultivator of gratitude, cats in the street can hurl themselves at my ankles all they want – my moments of joy come from somewhere far less random. From inside myself. You want rules for life? Make a daily gratitude list. Help others. Go outside in nature. And ignore false prophets.
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You always remember your first tattoo — whether it's something you planned for months, years, or even just a few minutes. Making the decision to get inked can be emotional, thrilling, and might even signify an important event, relationship, or life stage. Or it can be purely aesthetic with no sentimental value — it's up to you.
We talked to 19 people who made the jump from bare skin to getting inked for the very first time. There are stories of love, hardship, faith, rebellion — and even a few inside jokes. Read their personal stories, ahead, and then share your own experience in the comments below.
*Entries have been edited for clarity
“It's a matching tattoo with my best friend: My BFF4L. We got them at 17 to be rebellious and confirm our best friendship in ink, of course! We saved up pocket change all summer and that day, we cashed it in at the penny arcade and we each had enough to get this tiny tattoo for $80 (£55) each — it was totally worth it!!”
— Kristyn
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
“I wanted to get over my fear of needles, and honour a big life transition. It's an homage to Louise Brooks and moving to NYC when I was 24 (this was 1999). I picked Louise because I personally love the silent film era (and I've been wearing a '20s bob for aeons). She was also an incredibly strong willed, determined, intelligent, and wildly talented woman with a biting wit. I find her inspiring.”
— Julia
Photo: Courtesy of Julia.
“I remember when I decided to go in for my first tattoo. I brought in a sketch of a cherry blossom my friend drew for me — I held onto it for a year deciding on whether this was what I really wanted. On impulse one day when I was 18, I decided I had to do it. I brought that same friend with me for emotional support (I was terrified of needles).
"Spent about an hour before the tattoo freaking out, and then another hour totally calm while getting it. It's a cherry blossom with flowing petals on my ribcage/side boob. It's my mum's favourite tree, and we had one in our backyard when I was growing up. There is something really beautiful and comforting about it for me. I remember telling myself this would be the only tattoo I'd ever get. Five later... guess not?”
— Dasha
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
“My tattoo is a woman's face with a mask coming off of her. I got it as a gift to myself at 22 for graduating college and to celebrate the woman I came to be. I actually didn't know what the design was going to be until the day I got it — I had found an artist I really liked on Instagram and, a few DMs later, he agreed to do a custom piece for me. His one rule, however, was that clients weren't able to preview the art until the day of their appointment. This made me incredibly anxious, but also relieved — because unless I really hated it, I had to say yes!
"The added complication in this scenario was also that this artist worked at a shop in Lyon, France, and I planned to stop over there during my post-college graduation trip to Europe. My parents had no idea, and I told them I was visiting Lyon for the cuisine (lol). So, to go all the way to France just for a tattoo that I had no idea what it was going to look like was definitely a risk, but I trusted the artist and his portfolio of work. Needless to say it went well, and I still love my tattoo to this day!”
— Zoe
Photo: Courtesy of Zoe.
“My Dad wouldn't let me pierce my face and told me to get a tattoo instead. Growing up, I wanted to be a professional photographer, so at 18 I decided to get a 35mm on my back.”
— Samantha
Photo: Courtesy of Samantha.
“So, I'm bi-racial — half Black and half Puerto Rican — and went through a lot of identity issues growing up. I always felt a need to prove both my Blackness as well as my Latina-ness, but the Black part came a little easier based on where I grew up, in Maryland, where there are very few Latinos. So I always went to the extreme to show my Latina pride... including with a tattoo that reads "Boricua." With a crown over it. On my pelvis, right above my vagina. Yep.
"Back then [at 18] I was young so I wanted it somewhere I could easily hide it from my parents. I wouldn't be able to show this on camera because of where it's placed (I also got it from a not-so-great college tattoo parlour artist, so it hasn't worn well over the years) but I am totally down to talk about it, LOL! I don't regret it at all because that's the place I was in in my life, and I'll always have the funny story. But a crown... what was I thinking?!”
— Arianna
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
“Elephants are my favourite animal, because they've always seemed to be lucky for me. I have them all over my apartment, and I always knew that my first tattoo would be one. So I found an artist that I loved on Instagram and set up an appointment with her in her private studio. She does stick-and-poke tattoos, which initially scared me. But the process was amazing. I brought my friend along with me for support, but my artist made me feel at ease immediately. We lit some candles, listened to New Order, and in 20 minutes I had my 'lil elephant. Afterwards, we went out for margaritas and tacos. I couldn't have asked for a better first tattoo experience.
"It was my 25th birthday present to myself. I'd been planning on getting tattooed since I was 16, but I wanted to wait until I was 100% sure that this was what I wanted. The ribcage placement was an obvious choice for me. I wanted people to be able to see it when I wanted them to, but I also wanted to be able to conceal it when I needed. Everyone thought I was nuts for going for the ribs first, but I was determined! Since then I've gotten more conspicuous tattoos, but this was a good first spot.”
— Maria
Photo: Courtesy of Maria.
“I was just learning what the astrology signs meant, and I really identified with mine — the Aries sign — so I wanted to be a lil’ bad ass and get one. I was 16 (illegal)... but I own my sign.”
— Emma
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
“It's Keelish, ‘By the homeworld I wish to see one day.’ The phrase meant a lot to me and it's from my favourite series of video games, Mass Effect. I was 25.”
— Rachel
Photo: Courtesy of Rachel.
“It’s my husband’s nickname... he has the matching one with mine. I got it at 22.”
— Kara
Photo: Courtesy of Kara.
“It was a funny joke between my mum and I. When I was younger, I was a really picky eater. I did not enjoy eating at all, but when the pineapple came into season, I made my mum buy a pineapple a week. I would eat it so quickly, it was insane.
"One random day when I was 18, I told my mum that I'm going to have a pineapple permanently show up on me. She rolled her eyes and said, 'Yeah okay,' but then I came home with a small tattoo of a pineapple. She wasn't mad at all, she actually laughed. And now we have a funny memory together of my picky eating habits. Now I will always have a fun story to tell about my first tattoo and a sweet memory with my best friend: my mum.”
— Emily
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
“I had been wanting one since high school and was begging my sister to take me since I turned 18. We went to a local tattoo parlour behind a gas station (of all places), and I got it done before work. In hindsight, it was a terrible idea. I then had to work a full shift with my pants rubbing against the tattoo.
"At the time I wanted something that would convey my wild child spirit and I thought I was headed towards a career in music. So when I saw a heart with horns with the option to put RockStar in a banner across it, I went for it!"
— Asha
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
“I was 18. It shows that my mother is an angel watching over me. I got it to have something to remember my mother by, that will always be with me wherever I go.”
— Kendle
Photo: Courtesy of Kendle.
“I've wanted a tattoo since I was 3 years old, but modifying any part of my body was a big problem for my mum. Luckily, my aunt would indulge me when my mum wouldn't. I took a long time to figure out what I was going to get first. While I could've gone with something simple or something cute, I decided to honour the biggest influence in my life and my biggest supporter: my mum.
"I chose to have her name inked on me mere days after I turned 18, lying to her about where I was going with my aunt and even wearing thick sweatpants to hide it until my birthday party. There, in front of all my friends and family, I rolled up my pant leg and Mum immediately burst into tears (of joy, thankfully). She was touched that I would get something so permanent, and it later prompted her to finally get some ink of her own.”
— Valis
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
“I got my tropical hibiscus flower tattoo at 18 to show my love for not only the flower, but also my love for the tropical life, beaches, and sun along with all my family that lives in Southern Florida. Also, of how far along I have come with my severe Vitamin D deficiency, and seasonal depression — from being bullied in high school, to personally struggling day in and day out with it. I always have my beautiful favourite flower by my side, reminding me that where the sun may shine, that I'll shine with it."
— Lauren
Photo: Courtesy of Lauren.
“Infinity signs were super trendy at the time, and I knew I wanted to make a connection to my faith and heritage... so why not combine them all? My tattoo says “wiara,” which means “faith” in Polish. I wanted to do something rebellious, mostly. I had been wanting a tattoo for a year and got it at 19 — it seemed so cool.”
— Lauren
Photo: Courtesy of Lauren.
“The first tattoo I ever got is always the last one I mention or show people when I go down my list of permanent ink. Of my 11 tattoos, it’s probably the most poorly executed piece of art. It was my 16th birthday when my mother and I walked into the tattoo shop that we chose, because it was conveniently located a couple blocks away from our apartment on Chicago’s southwest side. After months of waiting to make good on my mum’s promise for this 'sweet' birthday, I left the shop with Winnie the Pooh smiling from my left calf.
"During my teen years, your favourite cartoon character was a part of your individuality. It was on the same footing as your Zodiac and, if you’re from Chicago, the high school you went to. I found Pooh to be cute and funny. He was also one of the few fat and happy beings in the media landscape, and I loved him for it at a time where I was still only pretending to be that way. When I finally started tapping into my own confidence in my early 20s, the tattoo started to feel more and more like a mistake. I hated that his belly was kind of square-shaped and his eyes are clearly uneven.
"Thanks to the internet and another adult friend who loved the creatures of the Hundred Acre Woods just as much as I did, I did a deep dive into the larger themes and meanings behind Winnie the Pooh. From there, the comparisons between the fictional bear and I felt more meaningful than ever, especially since I felt like I needed them so much. The themes of love, friendships, confidence, and even spiritual growth have served as an inspiration. And I think I have the perfect idea to get my tattoo fixed and improved, not covered."
— Sesali
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
“I got a matching tattoo with my best friend at 18. It was right after we graduated high school and we'd been thinking of getting matching ones for a while and we also wanted to do something slightly rebellious without our parents knowing. So the night of graduation, we stayed up looking for ideas, and we eventually decided on sun and moon tattoos. The next morning we took her mum’s car and drove to the tattoo parlour. We were so scared, but now we both have five tattoos each and can't stop getting them! It's such a loving memory to look back on now.”
— Ashlee
Photo: Courtesy of Ashlee.
“My first tattoo is a simple, black-line Earth with outlines of most of the continents. I had always wanted a tattoo, but could never find one that I loved and wanted to commit to. I chose this tattoo because everything I have ever loved, do love, and will ever love has been, is, or will be on the Earth. By getting an Earth tattoo, not only am I paying tribute to my more boho, nature-loving side, I’m also paying tribute to my family, friends, pets, and my love of travel.
"I chose to get my first tattoo in Iceland, when I was 22, to commemorate my first trip outside of the United States. I fell in love with Iceland, and it has since become a sort of part of me. My trip and my experiences there were nothing short of magical. Having this tattoo is my way of carrying Iceland and my memories of that trip around with me throughout my day-to-day life.”
— Sarah
Photo: Courtesy of Sarah.
“My 27-year-old friend died very suddenly when I was 18. I had just gone away to college so I wasn’t even in the same city as her when she passed, so when I went home for her funeral, I got inked. She had lots of tattoos so I figured it would be a great way to pay tribute to her.
"I got orchids because they were her favourite flower, and a vase to signify that I’d never forget about her.”
— Bri
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
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What do you love enough to defend? Sunday’s passionate meeting between Mars and Venus sets a tone for the week. Venus, planet of beauty, is always in search of perfect balance. As she journeys through Pisces, that search takes on spiritual overtones, making us humans yearn for soulmate connections and pure escape from the ugly parts of life. Meanwhile, Mars is on a heroic quest in Sagittarius, bringing out our gallant — and cocky — sides, and instigating even more than the usual number of moral and political fights.
When these two planets square off Sunday morning, it’s as exciting and tumultuous as any great romance. We’ll all be getting a surge of energy to focus on bringing more beauty into our daily lives. The air will be heavy with sexual chemistry, waiting to be ignited by true connection. Artists and craftspeople can get a ton of work done under this influence. Any household beautification, like painting the walls a calming shade of green or deep-cleaning your carpets, will be a cinch to complete and extra satisfying, too. You may find that you’re finally mad enough to turn off your notifications in the evenings or that you aren't quite ready to join a grassroots movement. Venus squaring Mars isn’t a great influence for starting a new relationship — it makes us attracted to people who make us mad. But for the partnered, it will help you have a good, clean argument that clears the air (and it'll make you want to bone).
On Thursday, the full moon in Virgo will pull emotions up to the surface whether or not we feel ready. A critical, nitpicky frustration is a sure sign someone is feeling angry or sad. The influence of Neptune opposite the moon means feelings (and communication) will be confusing at first but worth the trouble. Expressing yourself might even be healing.
Pisces February 19 to March 20
No matter how real a dream feels, you have to wake up in the end.
The cosmic weather this week is a swoony mix of romance and action, like a sequel to Black Panther where Chadwick Boseman and Michael B. Jordan make out. Several of the outcomes you’re pinning your hopes to are about as likely as that gay Marvel fantasy. I’m not saying your fantasies are doomed, just that you need a dose of reality — and some more time, communication, observation, and effort before you can count on success.
Thursday’s full moon falls in your seventh house of partnership (and enemies!), bringing the possibility of conflict with either someone you’re tight with, like a spouse or close colleague, or someone who rubs you the wrong way. That’s a good thing. Getting the feelings out into the open will help you and your partner figure out what’s really going on. One of your bubbles might get burst in the process, but stay open to what you learn. You’re in a process of discovery, so hold off making a decision.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Aries March 21 to April 19
See that, Ram? That’s a firework show the universe is throwing just for you. It’s a big, fat congratulations for manifesting your dreams into solid reality.
With Mars activating a pile-up of planets in your 12th house of the subconscious, you may not feel you’ve been getting much done. The last few weeks have forced you to slow down and maybe even give up on a battle you planned to win. But the 12th house represents the part of the brain that works when you’re zoning out and solves problems when you’ve given up. By letting go a little, you’ve made space for what you truly care about to succeed.
For the next couple of weeks, you’re at peak power. Strut your stuff, babe, because you are all that. You know what you want to focus on, so go for it. Messing around with unfulfilling distractions, on the other hand, will make you pissed off. If you find yourself in a pointless fight, there’s a good chance the culprit is pent-up sexual energy. Resolve conflict by asking your sweetie on a super-date and spend a few days shacked up, communicating with your bodies.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Taurus April 20 to May 20
How does it feel to be living your best life, Taurus? With Mars powering up your planetary ruler, Venus, the obstacles between you and what you want have fallen away. The friends who surround you and the joy of your daily life may look to others like a stroke of luck. As with everything you value, though, you’ve worked hard to create your abundance.
Wherever you aren’t seeing abundance, this Venus-Mars meetup gives you the passion to build it. With Mars in your eighth house of shared resources and Venus in your 11th house of friendship, you’ll be successful at increasing (or starting) a nest egg and at throwing a get-together to thank your favorite humans for being so high-quality. Being willing to go a teensy bit faster than your usual pace will help you make way more headway than you’re expecting, leaving you free time to relax once your goal has been reached.
Whatever you do, make sure your energy has an outlet and focus, and that you don’t spend that surge of inspiration lying around. Thursday’s full moon falling in your fifth house of romance, children, and art means that any frustrated energy will splatter onto those you love. Act decisively (like the immovable force you are) and express your true feelings to your sweetie, kids, or BFF.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Gemini May 21 to June 20
You’re strong, you know where you’re headed (for once), and — gosh darn it — people like you.
With a huge cluster of planets in your 10th house of career and reputation, people are talking about your work — and chances are what they’re saying is good. You could lie around and bask in your amazing street cred, but where would be the fun in that? This week is fiercely focused, which helps you tune out the usual pings, tweets, and texts in order to beam your brainy energy onto your biggest and best goal.
Despite some bumps in the road, you really are rocking it right now, Gem. It’s partly you and partly the people you’ve teamed up, too. Trust, your people support you and push you to go for what you want. When Mars collides with your ruling planet, busy Mercury, on Wednesday, diffuse tensions by starting conversations with your companions, collaborators, and colleagues about any problems you’re running into.
From Wednesday to Friday, you’ll be feeling the effect of the full moon as it touches off the sun in your natal chart, releasing a dose of creativity and passion. Because the full moon is in your fourth house of home, you may be irritated with family members and flatmates. Your irritation is pointing to a solvable problem. Address it now while you’re feeling strongly, so it doesn’t bug you all month.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Cancer June 21 to July 22
Feeling scrambled or angry, Cancer? This week’s cosmic weather report predicts lightning-speed passion and extreme actions — enough to zap your sensitive antennae. It’s been a heavy month and you may be overcompensating for lost time.
As Mars activates Venus, you’ll want to pour your heart out to a crush, hook up with someone else’s sweetie, fight it out in a frustrating relationship, mop up a friend’s messy love life, or overwork yourself making your home feel perfect. The urge to wreak havoc on your intimate life does, actually, come from a good place: You want more love, happiness, and connection. No problems there. The issue is that your feelings seem exaggerated and stretched out of shape. Your ruling planet, the moon, isn’t helping matters much. From Monday evening to Wednesday, it’s in Leo, the sign of romantic drama and tantrums. On Wednesday night, it moves into Virgo, making you notice every little problem and annoyance. One way or another, Thursday’s full moon releases those feelings, showing you why you’ve been overdoing it and helping repair any damaged connections. A sexy date (with a person who won’t turn your life upside down) will loosen the knots.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Leo July 23 to August 22
Are you playing the benevolent queen or a wicked one, Leo?
Attention and event invites naturally gravitate toward you, Leo. Thank your confidence, passion, charm, or the fact that you bring the party — regardless, you draw others into your orbit. That’s a power a lot of us would kill for, and how you wield it says a lot about whether your confidence runs deep or if it's just insecurity holding a megaphone.
Hopefully, you have a realistic sense of your talents and have gotten good at treating your people with kindness and generosity. If so, this week’s Mars-Venus collision can produce bold art-making, spontaneous connections, and the kind of sex where your soul kind of melts into the other person’s. If, on the other hand, you’re obsessing over what others think of you, watch out for your mean and manipulative streak.
Avoid any romance that requires violating your principles. True love won’t ask you to lie or hide, and it won’t force you to compete for affection. Remember, others can only love if they know who you really are.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Virgo August 23 to September 22
Find the still point in the chaos, Virgo. With turbulent Mars squaring off with your ruling planet, busy Mercury, the pace of life may be too fast to keep up with, full of frustrating miscommunications and mistakes.
Mars is currently in your fourth house of home and family, which has been keeping your so-called down time hectic since late January. Add that to the mix of annoying squabbles, slammed doors, and unpredictable conflicts, and you have a recipe for stress. The full moon in your sign on Thursday throws gas on the fire, bringing out your desire to have everything be perfect for once (is that too much to ask?).
Events feel chaotic, but it’s just because you can’t see the pattern yet. Your natural reaction to stress is to try to exert more control. You analyse the problem, try to figure it out, and when you’re not sure what to do, you often do too much, thus keeping yourself in a cycle of anxiety and frustration. Yet many things in life — like your friends and family — do best with less control. Let go of the reins this week, Virgo. It might be scary, but you’ll feel better in the long run.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Libra September 23 to October 22
What’s getting in the way of what you want, Libra? It might be a small, less-than-awesome task you’ve been putting off.
With four planets in your sixth house getting activated by fiery Mars, this week is busy. The sixth house represents all the details that keep your life running: to-do lists, doctors’ appointments, exercise, what you eat, walking your dog, feeding your cat, and, in case you weren’t already scrambling enough, there’s the work you get paid for.
On a good day, you wish there was an app that did these chores automatically and you could get away with half-assing them more than you probably should. That’s a pretty sweet deal. The one downside, though, is that you end up feeling like you can’t take care of yourself, which makes you overly dependent on others, which leads to unbalanced relationships. Yuck!
This week’s square between Mars and your ruling planet, Venus, makes you determined to increase your pleasure in the day-to-day stuff. A great place to start is that to-do list. Why? For one thing, you’ll be able to organise the seemingly tedious tasks in a way that makes them fun. But the best part is you’ll remove an obstacle that’s been making you unhappy for way too long.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Scorpio October 23 to November 21
Don’t you love being the centre of attention, Scorpio? Just kidding!
With Mars activating the four planets traveling through your fifth house of talent, love, children, and being seen, you’d be forgiven for wanting to crawl back into your ultra-goth pit of doom. You enjoy subtly influencing events, but it’s damn hard to do that when everyone is staring at you. From an objective standpoint, your own self-consciousness is the source of that spotlight you feel, making you hyper-aware (even more so than usual) of how others are reacting to you.
To complicate the situation, Mars, your co-ruler, squares off with Venus on Sunday and then with Mercury on Wednesday. Conflict and passion are the signature moods. Ordinarily, you’d be down with that, but the confusion of Pisces season is dampening your fire. Despite your best attempts, events have slithered out of your grasp. It’s not you, Scorpio, it’s just life, which is full of twists and sudden left turns.
The loss of control likely feels worse than the actual situation. The only way to get back that sense of control? Let go. By choosing to let go, you’ll have power over how you react. (Pro-tip: Thursday’s full moon is primo for a good cry.)
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Sagittarius November 22 to December 21
Do you know what you want, Sag? Can you hold a picture of it in your imagination for at least 30 seconds?
You will achieve whatever you put your mind to this week, Archer. That’s why this second question is so important: What do you want enough that you'll shrug off any distractions? Anything worth your Sagittarian fire has got to be meaningful and something you can put your own spin on. Chances are, you have a good idea of where to direct your efforts. If you’re not sure, tune in to that quiet, inner voice.
This week’s energy is unpredictable and will bring out your impulsive side, making random romances, travel destinations, philosophies, and projects seem like sudden destiny. Your true passion, though, has been with you for a while, and you keep circling back to it. Use this week’s burst of energy to make a bright, strong start.
Thursday’s full moon in Virgo (and the days around it) could trigger a disappointing realisation about the gap between where you are and where you want to be. Don’t let a more ideal alternative derail you. You’re pure power right now: Use it.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Capricorn December 22 to January 19
Where’s your heart right now, Cappy?
With Mars setting off the four planets in your third house of thought, you might feel like all the voices in your head are yammering at once. (Funny how that never results in good communication.) Mars wants to enlist those voices to get out and do something, but the squabblers can’t agree on a unified direction.
A meet-up between Mars and Venus encourages you to work hard on what you love. Given that you’re happiest when pursuing a goal, an action-packed week like this one ought to be up your alley. The problem is that you often expend the most effort on goals chosen with your pragmatic head instead of with your tender heart. Mars wants passion and Venus wants your most personal pleasures in the game.
Without a worthy outlet, Mars provokes anger and frustration. In your case, Cappy, you will be inclined to turn that frustration on yourself in the form of harsh self-criticism. Beating up on yourself will make you want to curl up in a ball, but that Martian energy still needs to get exercised. A really positive way to use Mars’ bold influence is by taking the risk of letting someone else in. Your friends and family want to support you and cheer you on; you just need to invite them.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Aquarius January 20 to February 18
Break out that diary and your basket-weaving kit, because the universe has scheduled you for a double period of arts and crafts.
Creativity is one of the weirdest and coolest parts of being human. Whether you’re writing an essay or making ingredients into a meal, turning an idea into a concrete object is kind of miraculous. As an Aquarius, you might be living too much in your head to pay attention to what you create. That’s too bad. When you make the effort to express your ideas in a tangible form, you end up producing wholly original and interesting creations. Hopefully, this week’s meet-up of Mars and Venus will get you to do more of that.
With the four planets in your second house of sensory pleasure being activated by Mars, you’re perfectly positioned to love up your meatsuit and all it can do. Express your creative side by cooking, decorating your space, writing a sonnet, planting vegetable seeds, or producing a series of brilliant-yet-disposable 30-second Snapchats. If that sounds like hell to you, an equally rewarding use of this energy is to eat, make out, soak in the tub, dance, do yoga, visit some friends, or bike at top speed through your favourite park.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
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If you've been on Twitter or Facebook in recent days, you've probably seen someone, very possibly an influencer, talking about a social media app called Vero.
That's right, another social media app is vying for your time and smartphone space. Vero (or "Vero - True Social") has actually been around for a few years, as The Independent reports, but it's now beginning to grow in popularity. This has caused some new users to experience difficulties in actually getting it to work, but Vero says it's "working to restore things."
Anyway, the big questions are obviously "what is Vero?" and "why should I consider downloading it?" After all, many of us struggle to keep up with the social media apps we already have, and may find our relationship with them can become a bit love/hate.
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Well, Vero is a social media app for your smartphone, a bit like Instagram, but it claims in its manifesto to offer a more "authentic" experience. It gives you an old-school chronological feed which means you'll see everything posted by the people you connect with, in the exact order they posted it.
"The feed is composed of your posts and the posts of people you're either connected with or people you follow," Vero says. "We don't curate it, manipulate it, insert advertising in it, or hold back posts. You see what has been shared with you, when it's been shared with you."
It's also a subscription-based social network. The first million people to join will be given free Vero for life, but after that people will be charged a "small annual fee" to sign up.
These annual subscriptions are actually at the very core of what Vero is about. "As a subscription-based service, our users are our customers, not the product we sell to advertisers," Vero explains. "Our subscription model will allow us to keep Vero advertising-free, and to focus solely on delivering the best social experience instead of trying to find new ways to monetise our users’ behaviour or tricking them back into the app with notifications."
Companies can obviously still post on Vero, but they'll have to pay whenever they include a "buy now" link.
So, is Vero truly a threat to the mighty Instagram and Facebook? It's too soon to tell, but social media apps can definitely come in and out of fashion, as Kylie Jenner memorably pointed out earlier this week. And if you are tempted to give Vero a go, it's probably worth downloading the app pretty sharpish, before those free subscriptions run out.
Gucci, the recently rebooted ready-to-wear and accessories brand that is beloved by everyone from fashion editors and celebrities to Millennials, regularly makes a point to reach out to youth culture. The Italian fashion brand works with acclaimed young artists like Petra Collins and has committed to going fur-free in an effort to connect with their fans.
Now, Gucci is putting its money where its heart is. The storied fashion house has donated $500,000 to the March for Our Lives, according to Business of Fashion. The March is being organised by student activists from Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in response to the school shooting that left 17 of their classmates and teachers dead. BoF further reports that Gucci is sending an envoy to the March on behalf of the company.
Giant brands rarely adopt a political posture, so why is Gucci taking a stand? For the brand, it's not just about courting millennial customers or representing their brand — it's tragically personal. Two Gucci employees were among those shot at the Pulse nightclub shooting in Orlando, FL in 2016. Leonel Melendez was a manager at the Gucci boutique at The Mall in Orlando, and he survived the shooting; Javier Jorge-Reyes, a Gucci salesman, was killed.
Creative Director Alessandro Michele said in a statement that he is "moved" by the "courage" of the students. "My love is with them and it will be next to them on March 24. I am standing with March for Our Lives and the strong young women and men across the United States who are fighting for their generation and those to come."
The company also said that "we stand with March For Our Lives and the fearless students across the country who demand that their lives and safety become a priority. We have all been directly or indirectly impacted by these senseless tragedies, and Gucci is proud to join this movement with a donation of US$ 500,000." The company joins George and Amal Clooney and Oprah Winfrey who have donated $500,000 to the March. The March for Our Lives takes places March 24 in Washington, D.C. and cities around the country.
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